Entwined
by Beccator
Summary: Marina Amell is struggling with her feelings of abandonment when Jowan unexpectedly re-enters her life.  He manages to break down her emotional walls while she helps him to attain the freedom he craves until their lives become forever entwined.
1. Chapter 1

Sitting on her bed Marina looked around her, the decorations were simple yet dignified. Purple, gold and silver were the main colours, lifting the dreariness of the brown walls and floors. Once having been a mage trapped in the circle and then forced on the road to defeat the Blight she had never known true privacy. She remembered how so many times she had yearned for just a simple snippet of time to call her own. Now she had it and she decided she didn't like it much. Sighing she shifted and rose to pace slowly around her room. She remembered the people who had come into her life. People she had come to care about, some to love, people that she had willingly risked her life for time and again and then they had all left. Now here she was at Vigils Keep, the Blight defeated, the Architect dead, Amaranthine and the Keep saved, with more privacy than she knew what to do with. She pulled out her journal and opened it to the page where she kept the rose Alistair had given her. A tear slipped unnoticed down her cheek as she stroked the flower that was now as lifeless as him. Casting her mind back as she so often did remembering how she had tried to take the final blow on the Archdemon, but he had kissed her one last time, swore his eternal love and then pushed her aside. Placing the book back in her desk she turned back the covers of her bed and prepared for another early night.

After a haunted night of broken sleep she wandered downstairs to oversee the running of the Keep. She knew that there would be issues for her to sort through as Amaranthine rebuilt, they had saved the city but not without cost. Trailing her hand down the bannister she looked younger than her years but had the walk and demeanour of someone much older, someone who had had too much responsibility thrust on her too quickly. Her rich brown hair glinted with undertones of chestnut and her deep brown eyes gave her a wise yet vulnerable quality. Her frame which had once been curvy was now slight. Many men had been drawn to her but she had pushed them away, still grieving for her lost love and the knowledge that even on the off chance that she fell in love again she could never lead a normal life or provide a child. Eventually the men had stopped coming and she knew there were whispers that she was unnatural to not want male companionship but she shrugged them off. Long gone were the days when she cared what other people thought.

She went into her office and pulled out the sheaf of paperwork that always seemed to be piled there no matter how much she got through the day before. Mostly they were pleas for aid from the people trying to rebuild their lives. Sighing she tried to sort through the most urgent ones, their resources were low and due to the complexity of trying to run the Arling of Amaranthine and rebuild the Grey Wardens she had to tread very carefully. Her mind drifted and she started imagining just running away, leaving it all to her second in command Jameson, and just living somewhere where no-one knew her. These fantasies came to her often lately and she knew that they were pointless but she allowed herself to indulge in them as she had not many pleasures left.

Her reverie was broken by a soft knock on the door. "Come in" she called out and smiled as Seneschal Varel entered.

"Warden Commander you have a visitor" he said looking somewhat perplexed. She raised an eyebrow questioningly, waiting patiently for him to continue. "A man, about your age, he says you were once close, but he refuses to give his name."

Marina frowned slightly "well that is strange. You better show him in then." Varel nodded and walked out to show the mysterious visitor in. A young man with black hair and wide earnest brown eyes walked in and Marina drew a sharp breath as she recognised him.

"Jowan" she rose and extended her hands welcomingly "it is good to see you alive."

She surprised herself with the fact that she was genuinely happy to see him. When she had encountered him in the dungeons at Redcliffe she had told him to flee and that she never wanted to see him again. He had hurt her, namely because she had tried to help him escape and not only had he lied to her but before he had fled he had pleaded with Lily to come with him. When she had refused he had ran without as much as a backward glance. She was glad to see that she had not held the bitterness within her. He looked just as surprised that she was glad to see him and stood uncertainly before coming forward and grasping her hands in his. She looked him over critically and was saddened but not shocked at the state of him. His robes were torn and dirty, his hair matted and he looked like he had not eaten or slept in many days.

"Maker Jowan you look terrible" she said.

"I was not expecting you to welcome me, in fact I had prepared myself for you to turn me away" he murmured.

She smiled at him "perhaps not too long ago I would have, but things have changed. Come, let us get you looking more human and then you can tell me what led for you to be in such a state." She felt that she already knew, although she had given him his freedom, it would have been limited being on the run.

She called for Varel and arranged a clean change of clothes, a warm bath and a hot meal. She left him in Varel's care and returned to her paperwork as she waited for him to finish. She smiled happily for the first time in many months, feeling her solitude lift away. She had had no idea how much she had missed him. A soft tap on her door signalled his return and he came in without waiting for her to bid him entry. He looked much better, the warm bath and a hearty meal had brought colour to his cheeks.

She rose from her chair again "you look much better, and the clothes seem a decent fit" she took in the simple black shirt and brown trousers and nodded approvingly.

"Thank you Marina, you have no idea how much better I feel" he grinned at her, shades of the old Jowan she had known emerging, instead of the haunted man she had found at Redcliffe.

"You're welcome my friend" she answered "would you like to have the tour? Or perhaps you would like to have a nap?" she asked.

"A tour sounds lovely, I feel much more energised and I have never been a fan of sleeping during the day" he replied.

They strolled around the Keep and he listened as she pointed out the various rooms and buildings, telling him of the battle and the strange talking darkspawn. He listened interjecting with questions or comments of surprise, especially about the Architect.

"Unbelievable" he muttered "you have led an exciting and strange life since I last saw you" he said.

"So tell me Jowan, what has been happening with you? Nothing good from the looks of it" she stated.

He sighed deeply "when you set me free, at first I was grateful and determined to not let you down again. I wanted to do something good with my life, atone, you know?" She nodded waiting for him to continue. "I ended up at a little village and helped to defend them from the blight monsters. There were no darkspawn but the taint had mutated the wood animals turning them into fearsome evil creatures. I even managed to learn some healing spells and I honestly felt that I was finally being worthy of freedom." He stopped deep in thought.

"But this changed?" she prodded gently.

He nodded "unfortunately yes. Word spread of a mage who was living free of the circle and soon the Templars came. The villagers defended me but many died and I felt that all the good work I had done was for naught. I had brought this on them and once again I fled." She nodded, his expression of grief touching her. "Then I just ran and hid, and I must admit I started hating you for cursing me with freedom." She started to speak but he shook his head asking for her silence. "Then one night I was hiding in an abandoned farm house when I thought back to our years in the circle and I felt so damn guilty, guilty for the lies, for leaving you there to face the consequences for helping me, for so many things and that was when I knew I had to find you."

She peered at him "for what?"

He grabbed her shoulder "to apologise. You didn't give me freedom because you wanted to hurt me you gave it to me because that is what I had craved, thank you Marina, thank you for being the friend to me that I never was to you." He released her and stepped away looking like a huge weight had been removed from him.

She smiled "no need to apologise and no need to thank me. We should be free and it's ridiculous that so many have to go to the lengths they go to be free. You are not the first mage to turn to blood magic and you won't be the last. Not while the circles still exist anyway." He shook his head, again surprised at her forgiveness. They continued the tour and wound up back where they started.

The next few weeks were spent like that, ambling around the grounds talking, exchanging stories of what had happened to them since they had last met. Both of them were happier than they had been for a long time. Jowan soon proved himself useful, training young mages that had joined the order, helping to rebuild the parts of the Keep that were still damaged after the attack and helping her slog through the mountains of paperwork. Marina soon got used to him being around and looked forward to his company every morning when she woke.

"Remember when I introduced you to Lily and you called her a fat cow?" he asked during one of their nightly conversations.

She nodded laughter gurgling from her as she thought of his reaction. "Then I asked why we had never gotten together. I thought your head was going to explode."

He laughed "and then on the way to the basement you teased that Templar Cullen until he ran away." They both roared with laughter as they remembered. "Maker I thought **his** head was going to explode" Jowan chortled. "Life was so much simpler then wasn't it?"

She nodded "yes but I don't miss being trapped there."

He shook his head "me neither, they were going to make me tranquil remember?"

They shivered at the thought "thank the Maker that I had passed my Harrowing or they may have done it to me after all that" she instantly regretted her words as a look of guilt crossed his features. "Don't feel guilty Jowan, it didn't happen and what is done is done. The only point in looking back is to learn from our mistakes."

He looked at her intently "wise as well as beautiful." He stood stretching "well I am off to bed, good night" he dropped his hand on her head as he passed.

They were in the practise yard using the training dummies to keep their skills sharpened. Marina watched impressed as Jowan froze one and then shattered it using rock fist.

"Your magic has much improved" she commented. "It's a pity things turned out the way they did, we could have used you during the Blight."

He flexed his hand "I wouldn't have been much use then. I was too busy whining and feeling sorry for myself."

She punched him lightly on the shoulder "that is very true. You were always having some sort of personal crisis. Maker Marina that Templar is looking at me, my hair looks funny, my robes have shrunk" she snorted with laughter.

"I wasn't that bad… alright yes I was, but there is no need to rub it in" he was laughing as he said it though and she marvelled at how much he had grown. Once upon a time had she said that it would have set off another bout of whining.

"It's good to have you back, I was very lonely" she admitted slowly.

"What happened to your friends? I did hear bits and pieces of your travels and I was under the impression that you were never alone" he brushed a stray piece of hair from his eyes.

"I wasn't but when it was over everyone moved on. Some later than others but in the end they left" she said sadly.

He draped his arm around her shoulders "well, their loss then." She poked him in the ribs and then ran when he gave chase, both of them laughing playfully as they used to when they were children.

Jowan walked into her office later to see her contemplating what looked like a strange shoe. "What is that?" he asked.

"It's a cake server that looks like a shoe" she said looking at it dubiously.

"You don't like it?" "I don't know there is something distasteful about serving food from something that looks like a dirty foot has been in it."

He laughed "I know right? Ooh perhaps you might get a pitcher in the shape of a chamber pot next" he snickered. "Maker Jowan that's disgusting, but you know I wouldn't be surprised if that's the next useless thing I have sent to me." They both giggled. "Where did you get it anyway?"

She shrugged "one of the Noble's sent it to me, apparently they are the new novelty at Orlesian dinner parties." They both shook their heads in wonder at the strangeness of the Orlesians.

Varel watched them come from her office and make their way outside. He smiled at seeing how she had turned from a sombre young woman into someone who was now cheerful. He was fiercely loyal to the Commander as she had saved his life on more than one occasion and seeing her so lonely had made him hurt for her. He thought of her new companion and hoped that for her sake he would not leave in a hurry. But he had seen the way Jowan looked at her and didn't think that he would be going anywhere anytime soon. Besides he had discreetly looked into his past as he had wondered why Jowan always stayed behind when she travelled to Amaranthine and knew that he had nowhere else to go. At first he had been worried that Jowan was merely using her but seeing the easy affection between them had cast the thoughts aside and decided to just be glad that she was much happier.

The two were sitting under a tree playing a game of cards when Varel hurried up to them a look of worry creasing his face. "Commander there are some Templars here to see you. They wouldn't tell me what their business is."She had a suspicion of why they were here and after telling Jowan to stay put she brushed the dirt and leaves from her clothes and went to see them.

"How many are there?" she asked almost idly. Varel wasn't fooled by the even tone as he knew her calm voice masked her worry.

"There are six of them Commander, led by Knight Captain Dawson. She nodded exhaling slowly to calm her nerves.

"Good afternoon Knight Captain Dawson, what a pleasant surprise" she greeted him cordially, hiding her revulsion. His close cropped red hair shone in the sun almost giving him an evil looking red halo. Blue piggy eyes, a hawk nose and thin cruel lips made him a very unattractive man.

"We are here on important business Warden Commander. We have heard reports that you are harbouring a known blood mage and murderer" he exclaimed self-importantly.

"Have you now? Tell me, where did you hear such nonsense?" her tone was still quiet. Dawson looked around him furtively, unable to look her in the eye. His glances gave him away though as they kept returning to their newest recruit. A look of understanding crossed her face "ah a spy. I always knew there was something Templarish about her" Marina was almost whispering.

"It does not matter. Hand him over and we will be on our way" Dawson demanded.

Marina snorted derisively "I will do no such thing. Now be a good boy and go home" she sounded like she was addressing an errant child.

Dawson wasn't listening to her however, his eyes were fixed on something behind her and she heard Jowan's voice "there is no need to hide me Marina. I will go with them" he had a look of resignation on his face.

"You will not" she was having none of it. "When was the last time you practiced blood magic Jowan?" she asked, she had not seen him use it and hadn't detected the taint of a demon within him.

"The night I told you about, the one when I knew I had to come and find you. Before I came I entered the fade and I confronted the demon I had made the deal with. I fought him and pushed him from my mind and body. I am no longer a blood mage" he said proudly.

"How convenient" Dawson sneered "I do not believe a word of it."

"What you believe is irrelevant" Marina snapped. "So he is no longer a blood mage, who did he supposedly murder?"

Dawson's face was having convulsions with rage at being dismissed so off-handedly. "Templars who were sent to find him, plus a slew of villagers that took him in and trusted him."

Jowan moved forward angrily "I may have killed the Templars, in self-defence mind you, but I did not harm one of those villagers. They were your precious Templars who took their lives. So intent on getting me they didn't care how many innocents were slaughtered" he was breathing heavily.

Dawson 's voice rang out "how dare you accuse…." Marina stepped forward putting herself between them. "No? You deny that your Templars are above such abuses?" all pretence of calm was gone, her eyes were almost black with rage and her face was turning a deep red.

She waved over a young mage recruit that was watching "you, Miller come here." He moved over reluctantly, he would willingly face down darkspawn but facing the Templars was another thing. "Tell the Knight Captain here why you escaped the circle and sought us out."

He nodded and gathered his courage to him "that one there" he pointed directly at the Templar standing behind Dawson "he would wake me every morning with his sword to my throat. He would say, is today the day you die mage?" Miller's face was contorted at the memory.

Another mage stepped forward "another Templar, one who is not here, he would order me to his rooms and beat me every day, telling me that it was the Maker's will that I be punished for the curse of magic." More of the mages came forward telling their own horror stories of abuses at the hands of those who were sworn to protect them.

"These mages came to me one by one, risking their lives to become part of the order. They would rather face down darkspawn than spend one more day being tortured." Marina was now standing nose to nose with Dawson stabbing him in the chest with her finger. Dawson's hand went to his sword only to hear the sound of many swords being unsheathed in response.

"As you can see I have many men and women at my command, willing to strike down anyone who threatens us. Now leave before I allow them to." Dawson stepped back knowing he was defeated and he signalled to the spy to follow him.

"Oh no" Marina waved her hand at him "she stays here." Dawson opened his mouth to argue but seeing soldiers and wardens step forward menacingly changed his mind and stalked away.

She turned to Varel "send word to the gate. No Templars are to be given entry." He nodded his understanding hurrying away. She turned to the spy who was now unarmed and being held by two guards "take her to the dungeons while I decide what to do with her" they started dragging the struggling woman away.

"Please Commander" she started pleading wildly "please I did not wish…." Her words were ended by the sound of Marina's hand coming hard across her face.

"Shut your dirty mouth you traitorous bitch" she yelled. "Take her away." The spy's frantic pleas for mercy fell on deaf ears and were soon cut off by the loud bang of the dungeon door slamming behind her. "Everyone back to normal duties but be alert. I wouldn't put it past those bastards to try something. They will not give up easily, but neither will we if such a thing should occur." Her people scurried away to do as they were bid not daring to look at her. Most had never seen her in such a rage, but most of them had not been around for the Blight or the darkspawn incursion that had come after. The ones that had been there remembered that it was her fury that had saved them.

Marina stomped into her office throwing herself on her chair. The anger drained out of her leaving her feeling tired but exhilarated. She had not realised how bored she had become. Jowan followed her in hesitantly and sat on the chair facing her.

"Are you alright?" he queried worriedly, half expecting her to send him away.

She nodded "yes, it will take more than those lackwits to hold me down."

He chuckled "mmm I can see that. I am sorry to have brought this on you though." He pinched the bridge of his nose "I should leave and let you be in peace."

She stood abruptly her eyes darkening again "you can't keep running Jowan. You need to decide, are you a victim or a survivor?" He stood to face her and stared intensely into her eyes

"I am a survivor. Once I was a victim yes and I blamed everyone else for my problems. Once I realised that I was my biggest problem things changed… I changed."

She leaned against her desk "good so you're not going anywhere and we may have the pleasure of ending a few Templars lives before we die. Things are looking up." He grinned at her and impulsively threw his arms around her. She returned his embrace before gently pushing him away.

"Have you decided what to with the spy?" he asked quietly, feeling somewhat rejected by her pushing him away.

"Well, I could send a guard in every day to wake her with a sword to her throat or I could have her beaten for her stupidity in becoming a tool of the Chantry or finally I could have her food served with this" she picked up the ridiculous shoe cake server. They both started howling with laughter, the tension draining away from them. Varel walked up to the door and stopped at the sound emanating from her office. He had never heard the Commander laugh like that and was slightly worried that the stress of the last few years had finally taken its toll on her mind.

He walked in and waited for the laughter to stop before speaking "have you decided what to do with the spy Commander" he echoed Jowan's query. Marina was still holding the cake server in her hand and the question sent them both off into another round of boisterous laughter.

Gaining control of herself she sat back in her chair "what do you suggest Seneschal Varel?" she honestly had no idea what to do with the woman.

He placed his hands behind his back "what she has done is treason. You have the right to execute her."

She shook her head worry clouding her eyes "do I though? Chantry law supersedes all else even the Crown. I do not wish to needlessly endanger the lives of those that trust me."

He nodded understandingly "I see your point, but with everything you have done I doubt anyone would back the Chantry in this matter."

She laced her fingers together thinking on what he said. "I don't know, leave it with me it will not hurt if she is left to stew." He bowed and left them.

Everyone stayed on alert but nothing happened for the next few days and things started to return to normal. Until a message came from the front gates

"The Revered Mother is here to see you Commander" she grimaced at Varel.

"Ugh send her in I suppose" not looking forward to the meeting.

Jowan was sitting at the desk she had provided for him in her office and made no move to leave. She was glad not really wanting to face the woman on her own. She sat behind her desk and waited. Varel showed the Revered Mother in and she entered with that strange undulating walk they all seemed to have. Her grey hair was pulled back into a severe bun and her piercing green eyes made her look shrewish. Marina stood "welcome Revered Mother Alira" her voice anything but welcoming. Jowan stood and dragged his chair over for her to sit on before going to stand behind Marina. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the window frame waiting for whatever was to come. Revered Mother Alira sat and stared not saying a word, a trick that she used often to get people to bend to her will. Marina was not susceptible to it though and unwaveringly held her gaze. Neither woman spoke for some time and Jowan shifted uncomfortably wishing one of them would break the stalemate.

Revered Mother Alira caved first making Jowan feel more confident of Marina's success. "Warden Commander I think you know why I am here" her gaze fell on Jowan, when Marina didn't speak she continued "we wish for you to turn over the blood mage and murderer."

Marina snorted "I thought I made myself clear to Dawson." She sat back in her chair her brown eyes raking over the Revered Mother's face. "Jowan is no longer a blood mage and he only killed in self-defence" she explained patiently as if sick of the whole subject. Her cavalier attitude put the Revered Mother was used to people just doing what she wished and didn't appreciate the Warden's approach.

"Regardless of his claims that he is no longer practicing blood magic you know there is no self-defence when a Templar comes for an illegal mage. His actions were murder and I demand that you hand him over" her calm façade had cracked and her voice shook with anger.

"No" Marina said simply.

"No? No? You dare to deny me my right as Revered Mother?" she was yelling now.

"Yes" Marina had decided to stick to monosyllabic replies fearing that anything further would erode her control.

They again sat in silence for some time "how do you propose we overcome this impasse?" Revered Mother Alira asked finally realising that this woman in front of her was not easily intimidated. Marina pursed her lips as she was wont to do when she was thinking.

"I propose a deal. We give you your Templar spy back and you leave us alone."

The Revered Mother shook her head "that is not acceptable as the spy is of little consequence."

Marina laughed dryly "your own people are of little consequence? No wonder mages are treated so abominably."

"We have turned a blind eye to you accepting apostates into your order but this cannot stand" she stood and swept out of the room.

"Well that was awkward" Jowan remarked "how long do you think we have before they come back?"

She stood and stretched trying to ease the tension that had crept into her shoulders "I don't know we will just have to wait it out and see what comes next." She sat back down and he started rubbing her neck, she resisted the urge to lean back into him and lifted his hands away from her ignoring the hurt look on his face.

The rest of the day passed uneventfully, she had informed Varel of the conversation and he had reaffirmed his position that they would all fight to the death on her command. She shuddered not wanting it to come to that but didn't see how else it could possibly end. Jowan had returned to his room and she had left him alone knowing that he was feeling guilty about the events. She didn't hold him responsible for as far as she was concerned he had had no choice in killing the Templars. They could spout their rubbish about it never being self-defence but push someone into a corner and they would either fight or flee. She was proud of him for fighting, not only against the Templars but also the demon who had sought to hold him. Disregarding her earlier decision to not bother him she went to find him to tell him. Opening his door she saw that he wasn't there, her shoulders sagged knowing that he had probably ran.

Returning to her room she blinked trying to adjust her eyes to the dim light of sunset. She was surprised that the candles hadn't been lit yet as the servants were usually more efficient than this. She didn't really care as she was quite happy to remain in the dark.

His voice took her by surprise and turning she made him out sitting on the day bed. "I have thought about running, but I cannot leave you to face this alone. I am not sure if my staying is the right thing to do though."

She walked over and sat next to him "what do you want to do Jowan?"

He let out a troubled sigh "I want to stay but not at the cost of people's lives."

She took his hands in hers "I… I don't want you to go."

This time he pushed her away "why? I know you are happy to have me here but you are different now. So hard to get close to, I have tried but you just keep holding me away." He peered through the encroaching darkness trying to read her expression. He sighed seeing that it was closed as usual. "I have come to love you Marina. I cannot stay having you so close but yet so far" his voice had taken on that almost whining, earnest tone she remembered from the circle.

"It… it is complicated" her voice was barely audible.

"Well explain it to me then. I have to know, if there can never be anything between us I will accept it but please can you at least tell me why?" He sat back with his hands lying in his lap waiting.

A nervous sound came from her as she had always been terrible at revealing her emotions. The last time she had let her defences down had been to Alistair. He had sworn to never leave her but had turned his back to her twice, the first time when he was to become King. She remembered his telling her how he could not marry her because she was a mage and the Bannorn would not accept her as Queen. The second time was when he had sacrificed himself to save her, leaving her to watch him die. She had closed a part of her heart and mind swearing to never allow it to open again. Jowan hadn't moved watching her inward struggle closely.

"I am not good at this type of thing. After Alistair died and everyone left I swore to never become attached to anyone again" she stopped trying to organise her thoughts. "But it seems that I have. You have gotten closer than you think but I can never marry you or have any type of relationship other than friendship" the words hurt her more than she thought they could.

"Why not? Is it because of what happened at the circle? Because of this trouble I have brought upon you here?"

She shook her head "no, nothing like that."

He sighed exasperated "then what?" "When one joins the Wardens there is a ritual you have to go through. I had to drink a potion that contained darkspawn blood." She stopped searching his face in the fading daylight for the disgust that she was sure was there, finding nothing but concern she continued "my life span has been considerably shortened and one day I will hear the calling and go to the deep roads fighting darkspawn until I die."

He stood pacing angrily "this is what they did to you? Maker what I did to you…" he hung his head shame overwhelming him.

"I am not going to apportion blame Jowan. It is done and there is no way to undo it, I have accepted it but… that is not all" she patted the spot that he had left next to her wordlessly asking him sit down. He sat their bodies close but not touching. "Even after the joining it is inadvisable to have a child but I could have still tried and possibly been able to" she stopped again choking back tears. Taking a deep breath she continued "but during the battle at Denerim we were fighting one of the Archdemon's generals who was a caster and he sent a spell that paralysed me for a time. Wynne pulled me back out of it but it was a hurried fix and not all of me was released from the spell. My womb remained frozen and soon it started to die and fester inside of me. It had to be removed and so even if I had wanted to try and have a child I cannot. These are the reasons why I have to remain alone" she finished the tears that she had been holding back for so long finally came.

He sat for a while taking in what she had said, hope sprouting in his chest "but it is not because you do not love me?" he asked urgently.

"I love you… there I said it" she laughed shakily through her tears.

He stroked a loose hair that had fallen across her face "I don't care that you cannot have a child. I never wanted children anyway. The thought of bringing a child into this world for it to have a life of running and fear, or for us to be ripped apart and imprisoned in a circle seems wrong and irresponsible. And as for the taint if I only have a few more months with you but having you love me then I will gladly take it and cherish every moment." He brought her into his arms.

"Now I feel like my head is going to explode" she giggled feeling very young.

"Don't do that it would take ages to get your brains out of my shirt" he was chuckling into her hair. He cupped her chin and gently lowered his lips to hers. He had meant for the kiss to be gentle but she responded with an unleashed passion. Lifting her easily into his arms he laid her on her bed gently tugging her clothes away.

They awoke the next morning at first surprised and then gleeful to still be in each other's arms. "So what now?" he asked kissing the tip of her nose.

"I have a plan. No-one is going to like it but it is the only way I see for this to end without bloodshed."

He raised an eyebrow "how is that going to work?" She shrugged her brown hair falling gently across her shoulders "I don't know but we shall soon find out. Come on get up I fear we don't have much time."

He groaned "I want to stay here all day" but he was up searching for where she had flung his clothes. Dressed and glowing she set her plan in motion and then assembled the people of Vigils Keep.

"As you know we are possibly about to be under attack by people claiming to have the will of the Maker. I do not believe that the Maker would wish for us all to lay our lives down meaninglessly so I have devised a plan. If it works there will be no violence and the Chantry should be somewhat appeased." She knew they wouldn't be as the only way to appease them would be to hand Jowan over and she wasn't about to do that. The soldiers and Wardens waited expectantly.

"The Wardens will be leaving" she raised her hands to stop the murmurs of dissent "they are going to Soldier's Peak and will be leaving under the cover of nightfall. The reasons for this are twofold, one they will believe that Jowan and I have gone with them and two it will make the running of the Arling and raising money easier if it is not connected to the order." She stopped and surveyed them gravely "the guard of Amaranthine will of course be staying and I will be leaving the running of the Arling to Seneschal Varel." She nodded in his direction but being unable to read his expression she continued "I have prepared a message to go to the Chantry tomorrow explaining that we are leaving and that any attack on here would merely be an attack on the Guard of Amaranthine." She stopped again allowing them to take it all in.

"Will you be coming with us Commander?" one of the Wardens yelled out. She shook her head "no, I have business to attend to elsewhere. I will be leaving you in the hands of my second in command" she waved her hand at Warden Jameson. "Go and prepare and may the Maker watch over you."

Heading back upstairs to her room she started packing some of her things. A backpack for what she was going to take and the things she couldn't in chests for what was to be stored. She stopped as she took out her journal with Alistair's rose in it and gently placed it in one of the chests. She wanted all traces of her removed knowing that if the Templars found any sign of her presence they would use it as an excuse to attack. Jowan was doing the same thing although he had no things to store. Time passed quickly and soon night began to fall. She went downstairs to see off the Wardens and give last minute instructions to Varel and the Captain of the Guard. "Do with the spy what you will. You know I had completely forgotten all about her" she was astonished as these things did not usually fall from her attention. Satisfied that everything was done she strapped her pack to her back and hugged Varel goodbye. He returned her embrace choking back tears. He had come to care for her in the time they had shared responsibility of the Keep and would miss her dearly. Jowan hung back and as she moved forward to say last farewells to the Wardens he found himself up against a wall surrounded by Varel, Captain Wills and Warden Jameson. He cleared his throat nervously not liking the look in their eyes.

"If you hurt her" Varel started

"we will hunt you down" Wills chimed in

"and cut your balls off" Jameson finished.

They all turned as one leaving him white faced and trying to regain the strength that fled from his legs. They watched the last of the Wardens disappear into the cellars that led to the tunnels they would be using to mask their departure. Jowan and Marina waited a good ten minutes before following them.

Once out of the tunnels they headed in the opposite direction of the other wardens. Marina looked up at the night sky thrilled to be back on the road again. She had started to feel trapped staying in the Keep and looked forward to wherever life would take them. Her happiness was short lived however as a familiar voice washed over her.

"Well well if it isn't two apostates. We know what to do with them don't we boys?" She whirled to face the blue piggy eyes that were regarding her. They found themselves surrounded by a group of roughly ten Templars, they were moving in with their swords already out. She clutched Jowan's hand thinking quickly trying to find a way out.

Not seeing one she tried to keep him talking hoping that one would present itself "how did you know we were coming through here?"

He shrugged dismissively "I didn't we just happened to be on our way back from elsewhere and saw a very curious sight" he stopped trying to gauge her reaction, not seeing one he continued "a large group of Wardens marching away. I thought to myself, now if the Wardens are leaving then their fearless leader wouldn't be far behind" he emphasised the word fearless, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

She nodded "I see" she wasn't sure why she was so afraid of this man, she had faced worse before. He moved closer to her running his gauntleted hand down her cheek "you know it is a shame you spurned me, we could have had something" he whispered. She swallowed her revulsion but this was too much for Jowan. Sick of letting her handle everything he slapped the man's hand away.

"You thought you had a chance with her?" he made a sound that was somewhere between a snort and a sneer. "Trying to punch above your weight there" he had drawn Marina protectively towards him.

"And you're not?' Dawson's tone was just as contemptuous.

Jowan shrugged "not as much as you ginger." Marina's heart was beating rapidly as she saw Dawson's sword come dangerously close. But then the opportunity for escape she was waiting for came.

"Good evening Arlessa" she recognised the voice as belonging to one of her guards "is there a problem here?" Her legs almost gave out from beneath her in relief and it was only Jowan's steadying hand that stopped her from falling to the ground.

"Yes guard, these men are menacing us" she said trying to keep her voice even. The Templars had backed off and were looking uncertainly at Dawson.

"Stand aside guard this is Templar business and we are about to return these two apostates to the circle. I think you will look good as a tranquil" he directed this at Jowan.

"Over my dead body" Marina yelled pulling her staff from behind her back. Jowan did the same and the guards unsheathed their swords.

"You cannot interfere in Templar business" Dawson snarled at the guards.

"Yes we can" the patrol leader answered mildly "look here we are interfering in Templar business." He looked around him at his men and they nodded in agreement.

Dawson glared at them his temper beginning to reign over his good sense. "Chantry law supersedes all else in this matter. She has handed over the Arling and…"

The guard stepped forward twirling his sword idly "she is still the Commander of the Grey" he stated matter of factly "and therefore you cannot take her to any circle."

Dawson's voice was becoming a guttural growl "but he is not" he gestured to Jowan "and you cannot stop me from taking him."

"No but I can" Marina warned.

"How?" Dawson was disbelieving.

"By killing you of course" her voice was calm but dangerous.

"That would make you a murderess" he was growling but had started backing off.

Jowan spoke "if anyone kills this snivelling worm it will be me."

The guard was trying not to laugh "look we can stand here all night arguing about who gets the pleasure of ending his life but it's really not getting us anywhere."

Dawson looked at them "attack" he yelled, getting no response he yelled again "attack." He was disconcerted to see them all doubling over with laughter.

"Your men… have… gone… they fled…" Marina was having trouble getting the words out. He whirled and saw to his dismay that his men had indeed ran for their lives. He started to run too their laughter trailing after him. She turned to the guards "convenient that you showed up when you did" it was a half question.

"Captain Wills directed us here, just in case" the patrol leader said.

"Well tell him thank you, he has my eternal gratitude." He nodded "will do Commander. Take care" and with that the patrol moved away.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Jowan asked "a life on the run?"

She stopped and pulled him close to her "we won't be running forever, I know a place we can go where Templars will not follow and we will be welcomed with open arms."

He looked at her suspiciously "and where would this utopia be?"

She laughed "oh it will be no utopia, in fact it will be a hard life in some ways but we will be safe and free to live together."

He waited but when she didn't explain he burst out "where is this place then?"

"We are going to the Chasind." Seeing his look of confusion she explained "I once travelled with a witch named Morrigan. Her mother is Flemeth, the one from the tales. Well, Morrigan wished her mother dead and sent me to do it. After we had slain her some wilder folk appeared and were very grateful as they were terrified of her. Anyway to cut a long story short they told me had I ever the need of sanctuary they would give it."

He nodded "alright then off to the wilds it is."

They made their way quickly across Ferelden, both having had to live off the land before made things a lot easier. Once arriving at the wilds she found to her relief that she was remembered and they were welcomed, especially once they realised that they were both mages. Their healer had only recently succumbed to old age leaving them with no-one to tend to their tribe. Jowan and Marina took over the healing and soon settled into a happy routine. As Jowan was going through his weekly habit of mixing potions he saw Marina walking to him a piece of crumpled parchment in her hand. It was a letter from Seneschal Varel telling them of what had happened in their absence.

The Chantry had not attacked as word had spread to the nobility and they had petitioned the Revered Mother into submission. The people of the city were disgusted that they would even consider doing such a thing seeing that so many of the guard had risked their lives to save them while the Templars had hid in the Chantry during the darkspawn battle. They had pledged their swords to Seneschal Varel and in the face of such opposition the Chantry had backed down, their power over the province considerably weakened. Knight Captain Dawson had been relieved of his position as the Revered Mother had needed a scapegoat for the poor handling of the situation. The wardens had settled in at Soldier's Peak and things were a lot better now that the order had been completely separated from the Arling. Seneschal Varel had eventually sent the Templar spy with some guards to Soldier's Peak with instructions for them to mete out a punishment. He hadn't said what her fate was and they were glad to not know.

Marina came back from gathering herbs to find the Chasind and Jowan waiting for her, at first she had worried that something had gone wrong but as she got closer saw their smiles and relaxed.

Jowan went to her and dropped to his knees in front of her "when I first came to look for you, I sought merely an old friend. I had no idea that I would fall so heavily in love, I know that everyone who you have ever cared about has left so I am making a vow." He fumbled in his pocket and pulled out what looked like pieces of very green twigs entwined together shaped into a ring. He slipped it on her finger and she was amazed to see that it moved and adjusted itself to her.

"I found an old book, one that had nature spells. I came across one in particular, one that allowed me to make this ring. It is an old Chasind tradition, an incantation spoken from the heart that would curl the greenest pieces of tree around the finger of your true love. Our lives have been entwined since we were very young and this ring signifies that our lives will be entwined until we die. Will you accept my vow?" he finished looking very nervous.

She dropped to her knees facing him "Maker yes Jowan. I never want us to be apart" she kissed him fervently.

He pulled two more pieces of the greenery "for it to be complete you need to craft one for me."

She took them and the book and read aloud "of thy greenest tree from thy nature's heart, I form a circle that shall never part." She looked in wonder as the twigs started to curve around each other in her palm.

"Wherever thou may ever be, my love will guide thyself to thee." The two twigs fully formed into a circle and she placed it on Jowan's finger.

"I am yours forever" she said simply overwhelmed.

"You understand what the incantation truly meant?" he asked.

She nodded "I think so, if we ever are apart somehow we will know where the other is?" she looked at him enquiringly.

He nodded happily "they are now half of a whole and as long as we wear them they will be drawn to each other."

"They won't rot away?" she asked fearfully.

"No, as long as they stay on our fingers the magic will keep them this way forever." The Chasind folk started cheering and music swelled the air as the happy couple and their new family celebrated their long awaited union.


	2. Chapter 2

They stayed in the wilds for some years, revelling in the freedom to be with each other and the right to use their powers without fear. They had given the Chasind no reason to regret their presence and news still somehow managed to filter through from Seneschal Varel. They asked how the letters got through but the leader had merely smiled enigmatically.

"Some things are better left not known" he had told them.

Seeing that that was all they were going to get out of him they dropped it and decided to just be happy that they were able to hear what was happening in the outside world. The news was always good, Amaranthine had recovered under the care of Varel and was now one of the wealthiest Arlings in the area. Soldier's Peak was serving the wardens well and Jameson had them trained perfectly.

They were in the healing hut tending to a young boy who had fallen down one of the many deep holes in the area. Jowan stood over him concentrating as blue wafted from his fingers, healing the boy's broken bones. She was called away by one of the young wilders gesticulating to her, a piece of the familiar parchment in his hand. She hurried over and took the letter dropping some of the berries that he loved in his hand.

_Warden Commander,_

_I have some disturbing news, there was an attack on the Chantry in Kirkwall by mages and a bloody battle followed. This has resulted in mages and Templars rising up against each other, even in our fair city. We have been besieged by people seeking refuge from the fighting. Sadly many of the homes and businesses that we rebuilt are now laying in ruins. _

_The people are calling for your presence and I must admit your return would be most desirable. Please come back we need you._

_Your faithful servant_

_Seneschal Varel_

The tone of desperation in the letter was apparent and Marina exhaled slowly. There was no choice and she had to go back at once. Looking at Jowan's open and happy face she dreaded telling him the news that their idyllic existence was at an end. He watched her walking to him her pace deliberate and her face glum.

"What is it my love?" he peered at her.

She gave him the letter and waited while he read it quickly.

"We are going back then?" he asked mildly.

"You don't have to Jowan. You can stay here and wait for my return" she knew he wouldn't but felt that she had to offer.

He shook his head "don't be foolish. You know I am not letting you go back alone."

"I know" she said softly taking him in her arms.

They said sad farewells to their tribe and left the care of them in the hands of their apprentice. They were confident in her skills and expressed this to the Elder. He had accepted their decision and happily allowed the young woman to move into the healers hut. They gathered their meagre possessions only taking from the healing stores what was absolutely necessary and set out at first light.

They decided to follow the same route back that they had used to get to the wilds but were not prepared for the devastation they encountered. It was one thing hearing that there was war but it was another thing entirely to be confronted with it. Both had seen much death before though and quickly recovered.

They made good time and were going around Redcliffe when they encountered a group of the guard.

"Halt" the patrol leader ordered peering at them through the dim light. "Mages" he groaned his tone full of disgust.

"Yes we are mages…" Marina meant to tell him fully who she was but he cut her off with a flourish of his sword.

"I can see that you are mages." He turned to his men "bring them in."

Her protests went unheeded as they dragged them to the dungeons.

"I am the Arlessa of Amaranthine and the Commander of the Grey in Ferelden. I demand that you release us at once" her voice was cold and authoritative.

The guard she was speaking to looked at her suspiciously not sure whether to believe the outrageous claims.

"The Arlessa disappeared" he sneered.

"Bring me to Arl Eamon at once he will clear this up" she was sure that she would be given her freedom but was worried that Jowan would be recognised and knew that if he was then she would have a fight on her hands.

"What's innit fer me?" he poked a grime encrusted finger through the bars attempting to stroke her face.

"Do not touch her" Jowan growled from his cell opposite her.

"Be calm Jowan" she winced realising that she had used his name.

"Jowan… Jowan… I know that name from somewhere" the guard mused.

"He is irrelevant. I demand an audience with Arl Eamon" she was now speaking through gritted teeth.

"And I demand to know what's innit fer me?" he said again.

"Your life" she replied icily.

"Ooh me life you say" he snickered. "My life is fine, it's your life that's in danger" he snarled opening the barred door and entering threateningly.

She took a step back as she had seen the look before, far too much power given to someone who clearly lacked the intellectual capacity to wield it. She heard the angry growl come again and waved her hand indicating for Jowan to be quiet.

"I am telling you for the last time guard" her words dripped with contempt "bring me to Arl Eamon or suffer the consequences."

He ignored her as his hand was tugging at the front of her prison robe. "I think I can have more fun by givin' you an audience meself."

Just as she thought she was going to have set him on fire a familiar voice came from the cell doorway.

"Stand aside guard" it was cold and hard and very welcome.

"Arl Eamon" Marina breathed "you really need to choose your guards more wisely."

He smiled a grim smile. The years since the Blight had not been kind to him. Queen Anora still bitter and resentful at his trying to take the throne from her had made life for him and his Arling very hard. He had at one stage handed it over to his brother Teagan and had only recently come back at his behest.

"Bring the Arlessa her things and then escort her to my office" he ordered the guard that had come with him "oh and put this man in her place" he nodded at the guard who had been intent on tormenting her.

"But Arl Eamon…" he babbled in fear.

"Quiet" Eamon boomed "you are taking advantage of your position. How many have you done this to?" He held up his hand "no I don't want to know. Suffice to say you betrayed my trust, your comrade's trust and the trust of my people with your actions."

He turned and spied Jowan for the first time and narrowed his eyes. "You" he hissed causing Jowan to take a step back.

"Hello Arl Eamon" Jowan greeted him respectfully. Although never having met, as Jowan had fled the dungeons before Marina had brought Eamon back from his poisonous sleep, he obviously knew what he looked like.

"Where did this man come from?" he boomed again causing everyone to shuffle in agitation.

"He is with me Eamon" Marina said quietly.

He whirled to face her, anger creasing his brow, looking as if he was about to speak but then thought better of it. He turned on his heel and stalked away.

Marina was now dressed in her own clothes and smiled encouragingly at Jowan as she was escorted to see the Arl. He smiled back, but she saw the despair in his eyes and she vowed to herself that she would not let any harm come to him.

She stood in front of the furious Arl listening to him rant "you are involved with my would be murderer?" his eyes spat fire.

"Yes Eamon, we are married" she said simply.

"You sully Alistair's memory with this union" he snapped.

"You sully Alistair's memory by trying to use it against me" she said fiercely.

"He came to my home, he poisoned me and placed Connor into a demon's thrall" he yelled.

"He did not place Connor into a demon's thrall, the boy did that to himself. If he had not been used by your wife and Loghain these things would never have happened" she spat back.

"How dare you accuse me" Arlessa Isolde interjected.

"It is true Isolde. You brought him into your home as you didn't feel that you had to obey the law that the rest of us have to live by. Loghain was the same. You both promised him the freedom and safety he so desperately needed only to cast him aside when he became inconvenient" she was yelling now all semblance of control gone.

Taking a deep breath she attempted to regain control "imagine Eamon" her voice was now even "imagine being abandoned by your parents because you were something that was to be feared and taught to hate the very essence that is you. Imagine growing up in a prison, unloved, isolated, trapped and full of self-loathing. Now imagine there is someone… something tugging at your brain and heart whispering promises of all the things you crave. Now tell me, how long would you be able to resist?" she finished sadly.

He contemplated her thoughtfully all anger gone from his face "I always hated the circle" he said "but we don't get to choose which laws we obey."

"Your wife did" Marina pointed out.

"And we paid dearly for it" he observed.

"As did Jowan" she would not give up.

Eamon sighed rubbing his hands over his face. "So you propose we just let him go?"

"You owe me Eamon" she said "I saved Redcliffe twice, I saved your life and that of Connor's. I was once your Champion. You owe me."

He surveyed her before turning to the guard at the door "bring me Jowan" he commanded. The guard nodded and walked away.

"I don't understand Marina. You were always so against blood magic and now you have taken up with a maleficar" Teagan's voice was soft. He had been standing to the side all but forgotten during the heated exchange.

"He is no longer a blood mage Teagan. He faced his demon in the fade and he defeated it" she explained.

"It is dangerous to face a demon in the fade" Teagan observed.

"Yes if he had lost his spirit would have been trapped there, its play thing for eternity" she shuddered at the thought.

He nodded considering this "what you said before about why mages turn to demons. You were not susceptible?"

She shrugged her shoulders "I was lucky. Before First Enchanter Irving became so, he was my mentor. Even after he was given the title I remained his favourite and therefore was untouchable. He was like a father to me" she finished fondly. "But Jowan was not so lucky" she thought back to the times where she had hidden with him behind bookshelves and in closets from the Templar who stalked him. His body shaking in terror as she held him, soothing him and looking back she realised she had loved him even then.

Teagan nodded again deep in thought but remained silent.

"So what do you think Teagan?" Eamon asked feeling very old and tired.

"You are considering heeding her request?" Isolde was incredulous.

"Whatever punishment you wish to apportion to Jowan, you must be prepared to face yourself" Marina faced this woman that she had come to hate.

"What? We are nothing alike" Isolde snapped angrily.

"Yes you are a pillar of human decency" Marina threw her arms up in the air "you cast out a boy from the only home he knew into the arms of the Chantry. You torture and imprison the man whose only crime was being yours and Loghain's tool. We should all aspire to your heights of moral excellence" Marina's voice dripped sarcasm.

"Enough" Eamon muttered. He agreed with much of what Marina said but wouldn't allow his wife to be spoken to like that.

Teagan had not spoken and rubbed his hands over his face, a habit that he had picked up from his older brother "I am inclined to agree with her Eamon. We have much more pressing problems as does she I am sure. I say we release him."

Marina breathed a sigh of relief if Teagan was on her side their chances were better. Eamon propped his fingers together considering what his brother said. His reverie was interrupted by the guard announcing Jowan's arrival. Eamon looked at the man who had engendered such loyalty and protection from Marina.

"Tell me Jowan, what do you think I should do with you?" he was interested to see if his character was as strong as he was being led to believe.

"I am at your mercy Arl Eamon. I will accept whatever punishment you see fit to hand out" Jowan refused to hide from the consequences. "However I beg you to release Marina, she does not deserve to be held responsible for my misdeeds" he finished.

"Well we can agree on that" Eamon smiled at him. "What you did was grave but I have had it pointed out to me that a lot of it could have been avoided" he nodded at Marina. "Therefore I will accede to her request and allow you to leave."

Marina slumped the tension draining from her "Thank you Eamon you will not regret it" she threw her arms around the older man in an impulsive hug.

"You will both stay tonight as my guests" he said taking everyone in the room by surprise.

"Is that wise?" Isolde spoke "he tried to…"

"I am well aware of what he tried to do Isolde. Calm yourself he is no longer the stupid boy you brought here" his tone was quiet but harsh.

She stepped back clearly hurt by his inference. Marina resisted the urge to poke her tongue out at her and settled for smiling gleefully.

They were there for the evening meal and at first it was incredibly awkward. Isolde glared at Marina and Jowan so fiercely he became afraid that she would attempt to stab him with her fork. He tried not to giggle nervously at the thought. Covering it with a cough he shifted uncomfortably and wished that they had refused Eamon's offer. He had said as much to Marina but she had not wanted to throw the offer of hospitality back in his face. Teagan and Marina tried to make small talk but all it did was make Isolde look angrier and Eamon more tired.

The meals were served and Jowan observed Eamon looking doubtfully at it.

"Would you like me to taste it Arl Eamon?" he asked quietly.

Eamon looked at him searching his face for derision but seeing none smiled "no my boy. That won't be necessary" he looked relieved nonetheless and began eating.

The tension eased and soon they were discussing the civil war that had flared.

"What are your plans Marina?" Teagan asked.

"At this stage just to get back to Amaranthine, the letter I received had no real detail and I am unsure of what exactly I will find" she laid her cutlery down on her plate.

Eamon nodded "if it is anything like here then it will not be good I am afraid. I have heard some news from there but my attention has been taken up with matters here."

She nodded understandingly "that is to be expected Eamon. I will not know until I get there and pointless speculation will serve me no purpose."

The meal finished they prepared to retire to their rooms but Eamon caught Marina's elbow in his hand "please give me the pleasure of your company a moment longer my dear" he smiled and drew her away to his sitting room.

Teagan placed his hand gently on Jowan's shoulder stopping him from following "what do you say to a game of darts?" he asked.

Jowan followed him paranoia flaring.

Teagan seeing this laughed. "Do not worry, if Eamon was going to do something he would just do it. He is not one to mask his intentions."

Jowan nodded and relaxed as that had been his impression of the man. The two men played several games and Teagan being the far superior player won easily.

"So darts is obviously not one of your talents" Teagan chuckled.

"No but I can set things on fire at will so it all evens out" Jowan retorted easily.

Teagan threw his head back laughing loudly, he was surprised to find himself liking this man. He had hated him for so long but seeing that Jowan was not who he had believed him to be his opinion quickly changed. Teagan had a progressive character, he did not hold onto beliefs for the sake of them. If he was proven wrong he would rapidly adapt it was a quality that had made him a fair and beloved leader in Eamon's absence.

They had given up playing and were now sipping from tumblers of whiskey talking quietly.

"I am surprised that Arl Eamon forgave me so easily" Jowan commented.

"As was I" Teagan agreed "but I know my brother there is another reason. I am not sure what as of yet but we will find out in due time."

Jowan looked at him "another reason?" the paranoia was returning.

"Oh relax, it would be nothing untoward" Teagan exclaimed. "Tell me Jowan what exactly is your story? How did you come to be married to one such as Marina?"

"It's a long tale" Jowan mumbled not really wanting to go into it.

"We have time I feel that Eamon and Marina have much to discuss" he urged.

Jowan quickly ran through his tale, stopping every now and then trying to gauge the other man's reaction. He finished on a sigh and took a large gulp of the whiskey coughing as it burned his throat.

"Impressive" Teagan murmured.

Jowan looked at him searching for sarcasm not seeing any he sat silently unsure of what to say.

"It speaks for your strength of character that you are where you are" Teagan opined.

"Perhaps" Jowan murmured "you know you really should have considered a life in the Chantry" he said in awe of this man's lack of judgement.

"Andraste is not my type. I prefer my women more… alive" Teagan snorted.

Jowan chuckled but then the smile fell from his face. There was something he needed to ask "Tell me Bann Teagan…"

"Just Teagan will do" Teagan offered.

"Tell me Teagan are mages considered criminals here?" Jowan was referring to their being imprisoned merely because they had been identified as such.

"We have ordered the imprisonment of any, the law states that mages are to be kept separate" he sighed hating himself.

"The law is wrong" Jowan commented.

"Yes" Teagan agreed.

"With things the way they are wouldn't you or the Arl be within your rights to alter the laws of your Arling?" Jowan wondered

"Martial law you mean?"

"Yes, I mean the Chantry's and circles have been overrun if that is not a testament to how these laws don't work I don't know what is" Jowan shrugged.

"New laws for a new time" Teagan liked his reasoning.

"Just an idea" Jowan remarked.

"Hmmm you know I think you are right" Teagan mused. "Come on let us go and undo this injustice" he stood motioning for Jowan to follow.

"Do you not wish to discuss this with Arl Eamon first?" Jowan was unsure that rushing headlong into something this important was wise.

"Eamon left me in charge of the guard," Teagan replied. "He will not go against me. He is merely back to deal with the nobility and the Crown."

Jowan blocked his way "are you sure you want to cause so much upheaval so quickly?"

"You are merely confirming what I have believed for some time. Taking children away and locking people up for something that is out of their control is sinful. I am changing it, there is no point in waiting" Teagan was adamant.

They entered the dungeons and Teagan ordered the guard in charge to walk with them. They stopped at the first cell looking in at a clearly terrified mage. Blue and purple bruises swelled his face and Jowan shook his head clearing the memory of when he had been in much the same position.

"Guard did this mage commit any crime?" Teagan demanded.

The guard looked alarmed "Ser he was picked up for being an apostate."

"But he committed no crime?"

"No Ser" the guard replied.

"Why has he been beaten?" Jowan asked softly.

When no answer was forthcoming Teagan poked the guard in the chest "well?"

"He is a mage Ser" the response was weak as the guard's alarm grew.

Disgusted Jowan raised his hand and blue pulsed from his fingers healing the young mage's face.

"Is there any way to tell if he has turned to blood magic?" Teagan asked not really wanting to unleash more maleficar on the land.

"If there was a demon it would have come out by now, but there is a sure way to tell" Jowan answered.

His fingers emanated a yellow glow and he performed a diagnostic spell that he had learned during his time in the wilds. He nodded satisfied with his findings.

"He is no maleficar" he announced.

Teagan smiled happily "good… good."

They moved along the cells doing the same thing with each prisoner. When they were finished he ordered the cell doors to be open and gathered the mages and guards alike in front of him.

"From here on there will be no unjust imprisonment of mages" he declared waving his hands to quiet the swell of noise "a mage will only be imprisoned if they have committed a crime." He held up his finger in a warning gesture "be warned that blood magic is still a capital offence."

Jowan stood back proud to have been a part of this wonderful new arrangement. He crossed his arms across his stomach and smiled. His happiness was short lived however as Isolde charged into the dungeons a guard closely in tow.

"Seize this man" she cried waving her hand at Jowan. "He has captured Bann Teagan in a blood thrall."

Jowan groaned in frustration and backed away from the guards coming at him. Teagan stood in front of him his palms pushed out in a gesture for the guards to stop.

"I am in no thrall Isolde" he said evenly. "I am merely doing what is right and quite frankly I am shamed that you would think me so easily swayed."

The guards stood uncertainly not knowing what to believe. Bann Teagan had been behaving curiously but he seemed fully aware and in control. Surely if he was in the thrall of this man then they would have just opened the doors and not bothered with any testing or questions, some of them reasoned. The guards moved to the person they thought to be right. More footsteps echoed through the stone floors and Eamon and Marina ran in stopping abruptly by the sight that confronted them. Half the guards were behind Isolde and the other half behind Teagan and Jowan ready to fight each other. Their allegiances suddenly split. Eamon walked forward and stood in the middle of it all.

"What is the meaning of this Isolde, Teagan?" he asked quietly.

"This maleficar" she gestured at Jowan "has Teagan in his thrall."

"Ridiculous" Marina stood half in front of him. Jowan pushed her gently out of the way until she was standing beside him.

Eamon took this in before turning back to his wife "you are mistaken Isolde" his voice still quiet.

"You are against me?" her voice was shrill.

"No I merely do not believe your suspicions to be correct" he had taken on a placating tone.

She glared at him wringing her hands in angry frustration. Her husband who once had bent to her every whim had been less pliable of late and this made her feel insecure.

"Stand down" he ordered the guards. They did as he bid sheathing their weapons but stayed where they were.

"Do you not think, Isolde, that if Jowan was a blood mage that he wouldn't have used it to protect himself?" Eamon queried.

"He does not need to with Teagan at his disposal" she screeched.

"Enough" Teagan stepped forward facing her. "The freeing of the mages was my idea. We were merely discussing the finer points of Chantry law when it came to me how very wrong they are. How very wrong we are to propagate it. In fact he tried to convince me to wait and think about setting them free."

"How can you be sure that it is your will?" she tried a reasoning tone.

"I know you are afraid but the fact remains I am in total control of my faculties" he sighed.

Jowan now moved to stand beside Teagan and pushed up the sleeves of his shirt "if I had practised blood magic, then I would have the scars to prove it. There is none."

"There are other parts of your body" she said dismissively.

"Are you trying to tell me you want to see me naked?" he asked politely eliciting a snort of amusement from Marina.

Teagan held his face in his palm trying to control the laughter that the image of the pious woman inspecting Jowan's body brought forth.

"You… you mock me?" she was scandalised.

"No mockery intended My Lady I am just trying to set your mind at ease" Jowan shrugged.

Eamon shook his head and then turned to Marina. "Is there any way to prove that he is speaking the truth?"

Marina scratched her cheek, she had never bothered to learn the diagnostic spell that Jowan had but an idea of another way of telling was forming. Grinning slyly she raised her hand and flames danced on her fingertips.

"Marina, wait you can't…" Jowan was sweating.

"If there was a demon it would have come out to fight." she said dismissively.

Eamon was satisfied "you are setting the mages free?" he directed this to Teagan.

Teagan nodded "they have committed no crime other than being born. We have conducted tests to detect the taint of any demons and found none. I was just warning them of their responsibilities. Think Eamon, we can use them. We need fighters and healers and our ranks are growing thin."

"You wish to give them the right to work and fight amongst us" Eamon said thoughtfully warming to the idea.

"You think this is wise?" Isolde yelled.

"Yes Isolde now go upstairs and calm yourself" he waved his hand dismissively at her.

"But Eamon…" she was now whining.

"Quiet if it wasn't for these stupid laws then none of what happened would have happened and Connor would still be living with us" he yelled for the first time at his surprised wife. "Now go upstairs and calm yourself."

Her shoulders drooped in defeat and she did as he said.

"So then it is decided" he turned to the guards "if any of you have a problem with this leave now. We will not stand for dissent among our ranks." He watched as a few guards turned to walk out. He held up his hand "please remove your swords and armour before you go."

The Captain of the Guard moved forward to collect the items that were being dropped unceremoniously to the floor. Eamon nodded again and walked away the stoop in his posture giving away the stress he felt from the last few hours.

Teagan turned to the assembled mages "who wants to join up?" he beamed at all the hands that were raised in the air.

Marina and Jowan left the next day eager to get to Amaranthine. They were making good time when a group of the guards who had left appeared in front of them.

"There are the filthy mages" the one that had walked with Jowan and Teagan the night before snarled.

"Move aside" Jowan commanded taking his staff in his hands.

"Bah this dirt thinks he has the right to demand from us" he exclaimed.

He waved his hand and the ex-guards attacked. Jowan froze the first four coming at them in a cone of cold and both he and Marina shot rock fists shattering two in quick succession. Marina turned a fireball on the other two and they thawed screaming from the massive changes in temperature before dropping to the ground. Jowan got pummelled to the ground by the hilt of a sword and somehow managed to roll out of the way of the killing blow. Marina sent a mind blast stunning his attacker and gave Jowan time to put some distance between them before he regained his senses. Although heavily outnumbered they had both been faced with similar odds before and fought strategically while the ex-guards fought instinctively. Marina placed a glyph of paralysis in front of her and the men that sought to overwhelm her found themselves rooted to the spot and at the mercy of their attacks. They all fell one by one until the only ones left standing were Jowan and Marina.

Blood was dripping into Jowan's eyes blinding him so Marina gently healed him and they sat away from the corpses regaining their breath and taking long gulps of water easing the dryness of their throats. Once they were rested they rose and put as much distance between them and Redcliffe as possible.


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of the journey was uneventful and in a few days they saw the welcome sight of Amaranthine's silhouette against the skyline. Their relief soon dimmed as they noticed the glow of fires burning against the sky and grey wisps of smoke floating lazily through the air. Sounds of fighting rent the air making their strides longer and more purposeful, they were running by the time they got to the gates.

The once strong gates were now battered and splintered, swinging uselessly, twisted from their hinges. Spotting a small patrol of guards Marina waved them over. The patrol leader stood in front of her spouting words effusively his elation at her being there overcoming him.

She raised her hand causing him to fall silent "relax and then tell me the situation" she said kindly waiting for him to regain control of himself.

"Arlessa Marina the situation is most dire. Not only have we had many abominations roaming but Templars have been attacking mages indiscriminately, most of them were merely trying to get to the Keep but many were struck down as they ran. Some of them were barely old enough to leave their mothers let alone having to fight for their lives, poor little mites" his face showed the distress he was feeling.

Marina nodded indicating she understood. She forced the feelings of despair that were threatening to assail her as she needed to be strong to try and restore order.

"What did you do regarding the Templars? she wondered.

"We guarded the mages as much as we could, escorting them to safety and sometimes leading the Templars into the paths of abominations" he was now smiling.

"Good man" she nodded approvingly. "What have your duties been?" she asked.

"We have been just trying to keep order. Our numbers are growing low and I fear we cannot keep sending men out" he said gravely.

"Return to the Keep and gather any soldiers and civilians that you see along the way and take them with you" she ordered.

"Yes Ser" he saluted and ran to fulfil her command.

"Come on Jowan the sooner we get to the Keep the sooner we can try to sort this mess out" she was running as she spoke.

He followed her, his eyes darting every which way trying to spot trouble before it came to them. A pride abomination caught the corner of his eye and he yelled to her letting her know before it was upon her. She darted nimbly around it and hit it with a chain lightning. It merely shrugged it off resuming its attack. Guards had heard the booming roar that came from it and ran to assist them. Metal clunked hard on its scaly skin and seemed to do nothing more than irritate it. It swung its huge clawed hand and caught three guards in its arc throwing them into a crumpled heap. Jowan and Marina both sent healing spells allowing them to get back up and resume attacking. Attack after attack was launched at it and they were just starting to believe that it would never die when an ear splitting death rattle swelled the air and it fell to the ground shaking the earth around them. There was no time to rest and Marina yelled at them to get to the safety of the Keep.

They fought many battles on the way and when they finally arrived they were exhausted. Their clothes hung in rags from their bodies and a mixture of ash, dirt and blood etched a grim tattoo on their faces. Varel ran forward at the sight of them shocked by their appearance but ecstatic to see them.

"Commander, Ser Jowan, thank the Maker that you are here" he exclaimed grabbing her by the shoulders and then clasping Jowan's hand in his.

"It is good to see you too Varel" she gasped trying to regain her breath still. Jowan nodded his agreement leaning against a wall.

"We told the guard to come back and to gather as many survivors as they could. I know the Keep is full to bursting but we cannot in all good conscience leave them there" she told him quickly.

He nodded "of course Commander, the Keep is safe and we have ensured that it is well guarded."

"Good work" she congratulated him.

"The rest can wait for now, I will organise you a meal, a bath and some new clothes. Shall I get your things from storage?" he enquired.

"Yes please" she nodded gratefully "after we are finished I will need a full report."

He snapped his heels together and rushed off yelling orders to the surrounding guards.

They quickly ate, bathed and dressed and headed back downstairs to hear the report. It was much as she had already guessed. Mages had fled the circles and many worn and beaten by the time they got to the city ended up succumbing to the siren call of the demons when confronted with yet more Templars. Some had resisted and were working in the Keep guarding it. Varel had said he was too scared to let them back out to fight afraid that they too would be overwhelmed. He hung his head in shame.

"I am surprised at you Varel" Marina rapped her fist on the table. "Not all mages will give in."

"I know Commander but I had to weigh up the dangers of what was happening" he was holding his head in his hands.

"Marina, you know how easy it is to give in to fear. Not just for mages but for everyone else" Jowan reminded her.

She stood abruptly, rounding on him "you agree with this?"

"No but I understand it" he said.

"You will assign mages to patrols Varel" she said coldly "regardless of your fears we need their help and we will simply have to trust them I hope that is not too much to ask?" she snarked at him.

"Of course Commander I am sorry" he said feeling very ashamed of giving into his base fears.

Marina was pacing angrily "he betrayed me" she muttered.

"No he didn't" Jowan countered "he was confronted with a terrible situation and dealt with it as he saw fit. Why do you think he wanted you to come back so desperately?" he asked.

"I don't know, to rub his prejudice in my face?" she said bitterly.

"Don't be silly woman, he wanted you to come back because he knew he was losing perspective. We know from when we are young what can happen to us. But it is in our control so we aren't as afraid. The average person has stories of monsters and gruesome deaths told to them but they have no power over it" he was telling her what she already knew.

"So when they are confronted with it they panic and all reason goes out the window" Marina finished. "It's annoying when you are so right you know?" she grumbled.

"It's one of my many charms" he poked her in the ribs prompting a squeal.

"Do you want to go and assess the mages skills and help Wills assign them to where they will be most helpful? I will go and speak with Varel" she walked out the door without waiting for him to answer, knowing he would do as she asked.

She found Varel in the courtyard discussing patrols with Wills. Walking up to them she smiled but Varel refused to look her in the eye.

"Excuse us please Captain" she said politely "I have some things to discuss with Seneschal Varel."

"Of course Commander" he dipped his head at her.

"Jowan will be coming out to help I would like for you to work with him" she instructed.

"Of course Commander" he repeated.

"Please follow me Seneschal" she turned with the man trailing unhappily behind her.

"I am sorry Commander…" he started once they were in the privacy of her office.

"It is alright" she cut him off "please sit down."

He sat perched on the edge of the chair as if ready to flee at any given moment.

"I understand your dilemma" she said slowly smiling as he relaxed "I had become used to the prejudice that mages suffer but having been in the wilds and having my powers accepted, even celebrated, the distinction is now sharp and I am afraid I am seeing it where it doesn't exist."

"Commander you know I have nothing against mages. I just lost my good sense" he said miserably.

"I know Varel. But we have little manpower left and keeping mages here out of fear will not help us. By giving them responsibility and the power to back it up they will have no reason to turn" she pointed out.

He nodded "of course you are right" he sighed.

"So let us put this behind us and move forward" she walked around the desk and briefly embraced him.

He stood "thank you Marina" he chewed his lip hoping he wasn't being too familiar.

"It's about time you used my name" she quipped causing him to chuckle.

With that settled she walked with him outside and called Jowan and Wills over "I have some news. On the way here Jowan and I spent some time with Arl Eamon and Bann Teagan. Arl Eamon proposed an alliance between us which I have accepted."

"So that's what that was about" Jowan said. With everything that had happened he had totally forgotten that she had been in a meeting with the Arl.

"Basically the terms are that if either of us requires aid we will send some form of it to each other" she explained.

"But Commander we are strapped here as it is" Wills protested.

"I know as are they. We are aware that both of our resources are limited. The thing is, what is happening here is small compared to what will probably be coming. The bulk of the fighting is on the other side of the Waking Sea. The fighting here has been only refugees trying to survive, or small skirmishes between the Templars and the few mages that were here. From what I have heard from the Free Marches though is frightening to say the least. The army of the Divine are gathering the Templars who haven't deserted and are forming them into a massive army." She stopped, looking intently at their expressions. The three men looked worried but determined taking heart she pressed on.

"Arl Eamon and Bann Teagan had already decided that they were not going to join in their march. Then, while we were speaking, Jowan and Teagan decided to free the mages from the holding cells and merge them into the guard. That will have the Seekers howling with rage. Of course as you know we will not be joining with them either, so we came to the conclusion that two armies are better than one thus forming the alliance." she stopped speaking and waited to hear their opinions.

"It makes sense" Varel agreed. "What sort of aid will be sent though?"

"Well wherever the seekers and their army go first we will send our armies there. In other words if they go to Redcliffe first that is where we will amass our forces and vice versa." She thought for a moment "I want you to send out recruiting parties. Find any able body that is willing to fight and get them back here" she said to Wills.

"Understood Commander" he said smartly.

"Jowan keep organising the mages and send them where their skills will be of most use" she ordered.

"Yes dear" Jowan walked back to where he had been before she called him over.

"Finally, Varel send word to Jameson we need the wardens back here" she was still not sure whether this was a wise decision.

"But Marina the wardens are meant to be neutral" Varel pointed out.

"I know Varel, but if we don't have their help then there will be nothing left for them to be neutral about" she chewed on her bottom lip.

He nodded "I see your point. I will send word straight away."

"How will you get it there?" she asked wanting to be sure that the message would not go astray.

"The same way I got messages to you" he laughed "Jenna, come here" he called out to a young woman.

She hurried over "yes Seneschal Varel?"

"I need you to deliver a message to Soldier's Peak" he said.

"Right away Seneschal Varel" she replied.

"One moment we need to write the message first" he smiled at her eagerness to please.

"Are you sure she will be able to?" Marina was sceptical.

"Trust me Marina. Jenna is most capable" Varel assured her. Turning back to Jenna "return here in about ten minutes if you would."

She nodded and walked back. Marina looked her over. She was about 18 year's old, golden hair that curled wildly around her head and shoulders with bright wide blue eyes.

"Very pretty" Marina observed.

"I didn't notice" Varel seemed genuinely surprised.

"Are you blind?" Marina scoffed.

"She is young enough to be my granddaughter, are you suggesting that I am a pervert?" he was offended.

"What? No… of course not. I… apologise" Marina stuttered.

"Hmmm" he hummed disapprovingly.

He went away to write the message out. Marina worried about sending a girl so young to do something so important when the irony hit her. She had been about that age when she had had to fight darkspawn and had always been irritated when someone disparaged her abilities because of it. She watched her a bit longer and saw that she was talking to Jowan. She was standing very close and staring at him obviously entranced with whatever he was saying. Marina stifled the urge to chuckle at his obvious discomfort as he kept backing away and she kept moving closer.

Varel returned with the message neatly rolled up and tied with a piece of twine. He waved Jenna over and Marina watched curiously as he tied it onto her wrist. Her mouth gaped open as Jenna shifted into the form of a bird and gracefully glided away into the sky.

"Well that was unexpected" Marina commented.

Varel grinned at her "I told you to trust me."

Jowan came over "did you see that?"

"I'm not blind." She cast a sidelong glance at him "it's not the only thing I saw. Someone has a crush on you" she said the last in a sing song tone.

"Shut up" he grumbled, his face turning red.

The recruiting patrols were somewhat successful. Most of the willing fighters had already joined up but Wills had chosen the recruiters wisely and the persuasive men and women convinced others to join the cause. They still battled against prejudice but her being a mage and Jowan's work with them calmed a lot of the fears. Soon the mages and the soldiers were working together in harmony and the incidences of abominations were fewer and fewer until they were no more. This broke down the last of the walls between them and order was restored to Amaranthine.

The fighting in the Free Marches spilled to Nevarra and was steadily moving closer. The wardens arrived and were soon helping to train the new recruits, even accepting a few of them into the order.

"I know the wardens are meant to be neutral Jameson but I think this outweighs the tenet of the order" Marina was saying

"Technically the Arling of Amaranthine is the home of the Ferelden wardens anyway. We only moved on because of that fool Dawson and his insistence that everything you did was connected to us and you didn't want unnecessary loss of life. But if anyone attacks here they are actually attacking the wardens and therefore we can fight back without it affecting our neutrality" he reasoned.

"True" she agreed "but still it is a grey area, no pun intended" she laughed.

Jameson shook his head causing his silvery blonde hair to fall over his brow. His green eyes looked her over and he wondered what would have happened if he had met her at a different time in their lives.

"The reason I called you back is that if we are needed to give aid to Redcliffe we need soldiers here to protect Amaranthine and the Keep. If you all stay here, as you just pointed out, then the neutrality will be preserved" she rubbed her hand over her brow, blue coating it as she eased the headache that seemed to be plaguing her lately.

He nodded "makes perfect sense to me. If you want some of us to go to Redcliffe we can do that too. Neutrality never really sat well with me anyway."

"Then why did you join the wardens?" she asked thinking it strange as the attitude didn't really fit. As far as she knew he had just turned up and requested to join so thought that he really believed in what the order stood for.

"I lost everything to the darkspawn, I wanted revenge and didn't really feel I had much to live for anymore" he said simply.

Marina felt guilty realising that she didn't know anything about this man. Her own misery had made her lose the personal touch that she had always prided herself on.

"Everything?" she prodded him gently.

"I was married, two beautiful children and a thriving farm on the outskirts of Denerim. Those soulless bastards slaughtered them all as I was helping to protect a neighbour's property. I should never have left them there but I had left our farmhands behind to protect them. They took a lot down with them but still they were dead when I got back" he explained painfully.

"Maker, Jameson I am so sorry" Marina grasped his hand and squeezed it comfortingly. He squeezed it back gently just as Jowan walked in. They pulled their hands apart, starting guiltily in their chairs.

He frowned at what he had seen "I am sorry I didn't mean to interrupt" he turned and walked stiffly away.

"Well I should go and attend to my duties" Jameson stood "I hope I haven't caused you any trouble" he jerked his head towards the door.

"Not at all" she reassured him, not sure at all.

"He won't set me on fire or anything will he?" he asked half-jokingly, half-nervously.

She shook her head laughing softly "no, now if he had caught us in bed or something…" she let the words trail off realising what she had just said.

His eyes widened in surprise and then chuckling loudly he walked out, stopping in the door way looking around just in case.

Jowan was stomping through the courtyard a thunderous look on his face. His old insecurities that he thought he had bested were flaring in his chest. He tried to think rationally about what he had seen but the guilty looks on their faces when he walked in worried him. Mages, refugees and guards scattered out of his way having never seen him look so furious. He kept walking until he came to the small garden that he and Marina had sat during his first time at the Keep. Sitting under a tree he stared morosely at the little pond watching the brightly coloured fish darting quickly through the water. He felt her sit next to him but didn't acknowledge her presence.

She sat there quietly waiting for the accusations ready to defend herself but he just sat there steadfastly ignoring her. His hand was plucking at a tuft of grass next to him the only sign of the agitation that was swirling through him. She shifted a little closer to him and sighed when he shifted away.

"So, I am guessing you are upset?" she finally broke the silence.

He shrugged refusing to speak.

"You are behaving very childishly Jowan" she admonished. "If you have something to say at least be man enough to say it."

His head jerked angrily "man enough like Jameson?"

"Don't be ridiculous" she said impatiently.

"I saw the way you were sitting and you looked damn cosy when I walked in" his hand was pulling harder at the grass.

She sighed, there was so much at stake and quite honestly she didn't have the inclination to deal with his tantrums.

"If that is all it takes for you to dismiss my feelings for you…" she started, jerking away when he stood abruptly.

"I haven't dismissed anything, you are the one dismissing my feelings for you" he yelled angrily.

"That is the most stupid thing I have heard" she yelled back. "You immediately assumed the worst of me and it pisses me off."

"Well it pisses me off when I find you holding hands with another man" his voice was getting louder.

The usual activity around the Keep stopped as the inhabitants strained their ears trying to hear what was being said. Eyebrows arched in surprise when they realised what they were arguing about, wondering who the Commander had been holding hands with. The mystery was soon cleared up however.

"Oooh Jameson what big green eyes you have" Jowan's voice took on a high-pitched falsetto.

The recruits Jameson was working with stared at him accusingly causing him to put his hands in front of him in a gesture of innocence.

"I never noticed the colour of his eyes but it speaks volumes that you have" she shrilled at him.

"So now you're attacking my manhood" he jabbed his finger at her furiously.

"You're so infuriating sometimes" she planted her hand squarely on his chest and pushed. He stumbled back and grabbed her arm trying to stop himself from falling in the pond. She fell against him and the next thing they knew they were sitting waist deep in water.

She looked at him and started laughing hysterically. His hair was sticking up in patches, reeds were plastered on his face and a bright yellow fish was struggling in his hair. She reached over and gently brushed it back in the water. He glared at her for a minute but seeing her dripping with water had an entirely different effect. Her shirt was pasted to her body and tendrils of hair fell around her face curling and dripping water in a tantalising cascade down her neck. She had never looked more desirable to him and he pressed his body against hers catching her mouth in a hard kiss. The laughter stopped and all that could be heard were gentle splashing noises.

They were laying on the edge of the pond in each other's arms letting the sun dry them off.

"Never let's do that again" Marina murmured.

"What? I like doing that" Jowan exclaimed in mock indignation.

"No, not that, I mean argue over something so silly" Marina laughed.

"Sounds good to me" Jowan smiled stroking her hair. "Although you never did tell me what it was all about."

She told him what had led up to the scene he witnessed.

"It doesn't explain why you looked so guilty though" he noted.

She thought for a minute "I think it was because I knew how it must have looked."

"Well whatever it was, I should have trusted you or at least asked" he admitted sheepishly.

"Yep" she agreed shivering as a short sharp wind whirled through her.

He stood and helped her to her feet "come on let's go and get into some dry clothes. We will catch our deaths otherwise."

They walked through the courtyard to the main entrance ignoring the tittering of the people they passed.

News of what was happening still managed to filter through and Marina kept them all apprised of the situation. The fighting had stalled in Orlais with the Seeker's army being pushed back by the mage resistance. Many Templars had deserted the order and fought with the resistance, knowing the tactics and talents of the enemy helped the mages and their sympathisers no end and Marina dared hope that the war would end there.

She was poring over the route they would take if they needed to go to Redcliffe. In her estimation because of the way the fighting was headed she believed that the call for aid would come and wanted to be ready to go at a moment's notice.

One of the recruits came running in "Commander there has been a small group of Templars spotted occupying one of the abandoned farms" he gasped out of breath from his haste.

"Thank you Sean" she nodded at him.

She saw Jameson and told him what Sean had reported. "I thought we were rid of the Templars" she mused.

"Scouting party perhaps" Jameson suggested.

"Perhaps, regardless it deserves investigating. I will gather a small patrol and head off now" she said.

"I will come with you" Jameson offered.

"No, Jowan, Varel and Wills are already away helping to rebuild the city, we need someone here to take charge just in case" she stated.

He crossed his arms unhappily, thoroughly bored being stuck at the Keep he would have relished getting out and dealing with the situation, unfortunately for him Marina was feeling much the same way and gave him no choice.

Luckily the farmhouse in question wasn't far away and they were standing on the perimeter with Marina peering through a spyglass trying to get a feel of what was happening. Sure enough there was a group of about eight Templars. She watched carefully and was alarmed by the amount of weapons that were littering the front yard. Way too many for such a small group and she surmised that this was a launching ground for an attack on the Keep. Being sure that they had not been tracked and not wanting to risk going back to tell the others she decided to launch a surprise attack. The odds were fairly even and she had confidence in the men and women she had brought with her.

They crept up through the long grass with her quietly explaining her plan and once she was happy they were close enough she directed her people into the positions she wanted them in. The archers hung back and knocked arrows into their bows waiting for her signal. The warriors crouched down ready to rush forward and attack at her command. She raised her staff in the air and twirled it rhythmically around her head conjuring a blast of snow and ice that froze the ones in the yard. The archers let forth a volley of arrows shattering some and knocking others back. The warriors ran forward finishing the ones that were thawing slowly. They stopped, ecstatic that their plan had gone so well but in their jubilation they didn't see the Templars that had appeared from the wooded area to their right.

The tables were turned and they found themselves under furious attack. They fought back hard but were soon separated by their enemies. She could still see the others though and threw out group heals in between her own attacks keeping her people on their feet and fighting. Just as she thought they were about to win her mana drained leaving her feeling woozy and stunned. She fumbled blindly for the lyrium potion that she kept on her belt but it was dashed out of her hand. A hand clamped itself over her mouth and an arm gripped her around her chest dragging her through a copse of trees.

Her patrol too busy fighting for their lives didn't notice her absence until the last Templar was felled. They turned around to share their elation with her and panicked when they didn't see her standing. Checking the dead bodies to see if she had fallen they were even more alarmed when it seemed that she had just vanished.

Jenna took charge "quickly, go and search for her" she instructed. "I will go back to the Keep and inform the others" she shifted into a bird and flew off her wings flapping rapidly.


	4. Chapter 4

Jowan, Wills and Varel had returned tired but happy with their efforts of rebuilding the gates and walls of the city. Jameson was telling them where Marina was and why.

"How long have they been gone?" Jowan asked.

"About an hour, it would take roughly half that time for the trip there and back" Jameson explained.

Jowan nodded "well no need to worry just yet then" he put his hands behind his head.

Varel nodded "she is more than capable of taking care of herself" he opined.

The four men stood together companionably watching the general activity in front of them. At first they ignored the bird that was flying frantically towards them, when it transformed into Jenna before them they stepped back in surprise.

"Hurry" she gasped "the Commander had disappeared."

"What do you mean she has disappeared" Varel demanded.

"No time to explain, quickly follow me" she started running gesturing to them to follow her.

"Wills take charge" Varel yelled as he ran past him.

They came to the scene of the battle, the patrol had returned unable to find her and unsure of what to do were waiting for someone to give them direction. Jameson ran over barking questions at them while Varel spun trying to find some sign of where she might be. Jowan felt a hard tug on his finger and looked down at the ring that Marina had put there. They had never been apart for very long so he had forgotten about the legend. It tugged at him and he knew which way to go.

"This way" he yelled running through the copse of trees.

Varel and Jameson ran after him trying to keep up with his frantic pace. It was hard going as he kept changing directions following the rings urgent pulls. He started to slow as the tugging became fainter and a familiar voice slipped through his mind. He shook his head trying to clear it, it couldn't be he thought, he had beaten it, he was free.

"You are never free Jowan" its voice curled around his brain seductive, like a lovers embrace. "I can help you find her" it dug further in.

"No" he muttered.

"I can all it takes is just a drop of blood."

"No" his voice was a rasp.

"He is violating her Jowan, please let me help you" the voice was supplicating.

"Get out" he yelled.

"She is worth more to you than a silly principle is she not?" the voice was now demanding.

"She would never forgive me" he fought the temptation.

"She won't be alive to forgive. She is dying Jowan" it played to his greatest fear.

A glint of metal caught his eye and he saw with shock his knife in his hand. He didn't remember taking it out. He tried to drop it but his hand wouldn't obey.

"Use it Jowan, if not your blood then one of theirs" it was teasing now.

Blood rushed to his head and spots blurred his vision, he shook his head, the pounding of it filled his ears.

"So easy my love, one cut and you will be with her" the voice was getting stronger.

His mind was racing, the part that had protested was getting weaker and he was seeing sense in what the desire demon was telling him. One cut and he would be with her, he twirled the knife, just a little blood and she would be saved, he raised it in the air, the soft flesh of his hand beckoning to him. A sharp pain shot through his head and he collapsed forward to his knees a pained groan slipping out.

Jameson had been watching him, having worked closely with mages he had seen it before. He saw him struggling with the demon and had concentrated on closing the gap between them. He knew the powers of the ring on Jowan's finger and they needed him aware enough to let the ring guide them. Doing the only thing he could think of he picked up a piece of timber as he ran swinging it and letting it connect with Jowan's head.

Jowan was stumbling to his feet "Maker, I nearly… I was about to…" he was up and looking at the man who had saved him "thank you" he said humbly hanging his head. He pushed his hand to his wound quickly healing it.

"You can thank me later" he pointed to Jowan's hand "which way?"

Jowan got his bearings "this way" he panted.

They found themselves at a small hut nestled in the woods, seeing the fresh corpse lying on the doorstep they surmised that this one hadn't been abandoned. The three men looked at each other and quietly opened the door wincing as it creaked loudly. Sneaking through they barely avoided the piles of papers and rubbish that were collected there. Jowan walked into what looked like it should be a kitchen, opening the newly cleared cellar door they jumped nimbly down taking their weapons in hand.

Jowan tempered his steps not wanting to alert anyone to their presence. "I hope we're not too late" he muttered fearfully.

"If we are you're taking me with you into the fade so I can stab that demon multiple times" Jameson's voice was a low rumble.

"You and me both" Varel joined in.

They could hear a man's faint voice "you are mine now. They will never find you."

The sound of a muffled protest could be heard. They crept closer trying to see if he was alone.

"Hush… hush… I won't hurt you anymore. We will live here away from the madness, just us forever. A Templar protecting a mage just as the Maker wants" he was clearly insane.

A man was crouched down in front of Marina the moonlight shimmering over armour that was dented and grimy. His hand was stroking her face while his other hand was holding her shoulder so she couldn't move. Jowan moved forward preparing an attack.

Marina couldn't see them and in a desperate bid for freedom raised her hand trying to conjure a rock fist. A white light emanated from her captor and her mana drained as the cleanse area took effect. It reached Jowan's feet and he was left swaying helplessly. Jameson seeing this nodded to Varel, they raised their swords closing in on the crazed Templar. So intent on keeping his victim powerless he didn't hear the soft steps coming toward him and only knew a blinding pain as two swords plunged through his armour and into his back.

Jowan regained his senses and was dashing toward them, he stepped over the dead body making sure not to slip in the bloody pool that was forming. Pulling the cloth that had been stuffed in Marina's mouth out and uncorking a lyrium potion he tipped it gently into her mouth. He was looking her over for injuries and asking frantic questions becoming increasingly panicked when she didn't answer. Looking at her he saw that she was fully aware, her mouth kept moving but no noise came out. He took her in his arms murmuring words of comfort in her ear. Her trembling started to subside and gut wrenching sobs heaved out of her.

Varel and Jameson were crouching over the man they had just killed. Jameson stood and started kicking the body sharply.

"He's already dead" Varel pointed out.

"I know but if I had known it was him I would have prolonged it to cause him as much pain as possible" he growled.

This got Jowan's attention and he looked at the man who had nearly destroyed everything.

"Dawson" he grunted resisting the urge to get up and join Jameson in his kicking.

He stood and helped Marina to her feet, her legs sagged as they couldn't hold her weight so he swung her into his arms nestling her head against his chest.

After settling Marina in bed and thankfully getting her to speak he left the room to inform the others of the situation. They were waiting impatiently outside pacing around each other.

"Physically she is fine and with some rest will fully recover" Jowan announced.

They stopped pacing identical expressions of relief on their faces.

"What about mentally?" Varel asked noticing how Jowan had phrased his diagnosis.

"She is speaking again thank the Maker but as for lasting effects that remains to be see. But she is a strong woman and that will help her get through it. His being dead made her happy though" he said.

"His being dead makes us all happy" Jameson smirked.

Marina was up and about the next day much to Jowan's chagrin as he wanted her to rest more.

"Stop it Jowan, I am fine and there is still much to be done. Sitting in here moping does no good for anyone" she waved her hand impatiently at him.

He gave up and accompanied her to her office. She sat at her desk going over the strategy they had developed in case of attack. Her belief that the fighting would get to Redcliffe before them was now shaken when she had seen the arsenal from the day before. Not that it was there anymore, Wills had already taken guards and collected all the weapons bringing them back to the Keep's dwindling armoury.

She looked up and noticed Jowan staring at her worriedly. "Can you do something for me?"

"Anything" he leaned towards her.

"Go and find Wills and ask him to come and see me."

After he left she leaned back in her chair staring at the ceiling. Her mind went back to the previous nights events which made her shiver. She had faced overwhelming odds and thought she was going to die many times in her life but had always been able to fight back. Being trapped and powerless at the mercy of a madman was something she had never had to deal with before. Thank the Maker that her rescue had come when it did as she had been terrified of what Dawson was going to do to her.

"Commander?" Wills was standing in front of her desk.

"Did you find any reason for them to be there, any evidence of a planned attack" she queried.

"I didn't find anything like that it seems that they were a group of rogue Templars and the weapons they had collected were from people that they killed. We found… other things that we think were trophies" he looked grim.

"Trophies? Trophies of what?"

"Of kills Commander"

"You mean like armour, things like that?"

"No I mean fingers and teeth, things like that" he shuddered remembering the horror of what they found.

Marina's face went white, she knew that things were bad but what he described was too gruesome to even imagine.

"Thank the Maker we found them when we did then" she whispered.

"Indeed Commander" Wills appeared to be thinking "what should we do with the house? It seems… wrong to just leave it as it is."

"Burn it."

"Yes Commander" he turned smartly and walked out.

Jowan was looking for Jameson when he spied a huddled form shaking and sobbing, he walked over concerned to see someone so upset.

"Jenna?" he was crouching in front of her.

She looked up her face red and blotched from tears, loud hiccups were coming from her as she tried to calm down.

"What has made you so upset?" he held his finger under her chin to stop her from looking back down.

"I went to help with getting the weapons and things and…." her voice cracked as more weeping overcame her.

He waited patiently for her to regain some control.

"It was horrible, there was blood everywhere, skulls hung from the ceiling and there were other body parts around the room like… like decorations" she finished weakly.

He helped her to her feet and placed a comforting arm around her shoulders.

"What makes people do things like that?" she was still hiccupping.

"I do not know, a question best left unanswered I think" he replied quietly.

She buried her head in his chest still crying, he was feeling very uncomfortable but seeing her need for comfort didn't have the heart to push her away. After a few minutes he grasped her gently by the shoulders and putting a few precious centimetres between them looked down on her kindly intending to say something comforting. She returned his gaze and misreading the look in his eyes planted her lips firmly against his.

"You bastard" Jameson was storming across to them murder in his eyes. Not heeding Jowan's protestations he punched him as hard as he could on the jaw.

Jowan fell hard to the ground his head ringing, he could hear Jenna's screams in the background as Jameson picked him up by his shirt hitting him again and then everything went black.

He awoke to the tingling of healing magic and Marina leaning over him worriedly. He rose to a sitting position and saw Jameson hovering nearby a sheepish look on his face. Jenna was nowhere to be seen and he blinked recalling what had led for him to be in this position.

"Maker, Marina it wasn't what it looked like" he exclaimed.

"Uh huh" she crossed her arms a mischievous look in her eye.

"It wasn't, I swear before the Maker I was just…" he stopped when he realised she was laughing.

"I know Jenna explained it. I just couldn't help myself" she chortled.

"You have a strange sense of humour woman" he grumbled good-naturedly.

"Sorry about that old chap" Jameson apologised awkwardly.

"You seem to take pleasure in hitting me lately" Jowan wasn't about to let it go easily.

"What other time did he hit you?"

The two men stared at each other remembering that Marina had no idea of some of the previous night's events.

"Well, I'll leave you to it then" Jameson walked rapidly away.

"Well?" Marina was staring at him.

He sighed taking her by the arm he led her to the little garden that they used as their sanctuary. He sat with her under the tree and told her about the desire demon that had nearly brought him down and how Jameson had saved him.

"I am sorry I should have told you but you had already gone through so much I didn't want to worry you further" he was staring at his hands waiting for her to speak.

When she didn't speak he mustered his courage "if you want me to leave I wouldn't blame you. I honestly thought I had beaten it but what if I do fall? I am dangerous" he finished miserably.

"I don't think so" she murmured.

"How do you come to that conclusion" he gave her a sidelong glance.

"How long have we been together, do you think?" she laid her hand on his.

"I don't know seven, maybe eight years" he saw her looking at him shocked "what? Time is funny in the wilds" he said defensively.

"True and close enough, anyway my point is I have seen you face many adverse things and not once did you turn back to blood magic."

"Yes but I nearly did this time and it takes only once for it to become a downhill slide" he pointed out.

"Jowan I love you and I will not let a demon take you" she said firmly.

"But what if…" he began.

"If we live our lives by what ifs imagine all the things that would never happen. We would all be too scared to leave our houses" she stood and helped him up. "Come on I need to find a certain young woman and make sure she is alright. Varel said she flew into a tree and won't come down" she laughed at the strangeness of their lives.


	5. Chapter 5

Marina wanted to avoid being involved in the mage/Templar conflict as much as possible, although she was a mage she reasoned that her responsibilities to Amaranthine and to the Ferelden chapter of the wardens outweighed any moral obligations she may have felt if her situation was different. However the decision was taken out of her hands by the arrival of two very unexpected visitors.

Outside refereeing yet another argument between a group of refugees Marina spotted two figures escorted by guards coming towards her. She recognised one of them straight away, the other one was vaguely familiar but she couldn't quite place who it was. They stopped nearby waiting for her to finish what she was doing under the close supervision of the guard.

"You know Commander that as a Grey Warden I should be able to come and go as I please" Anders declared in irritation.

"You left swearing to never return Anders so as far as everyone here is concerned you are a warden in taint only. Oh and by the way hello" she retorted.

The other man raised his hand to quiet Anders "be silent Anders your behaviour does not help us."

"Arlessa Marina, we have travelled from the battlefield of Orlais to bring you a plea for help" he bowed to her.

"There is no need to bow and you better come through to my office" she still couldn't place who he was and still annoyed at Anders didn't care to ask for his name.

"I am sorry Arlessa I feel that we have gotten off on the wrong foot" he was sitting on a chair facing her. "You probably do not remember me but we have met before."

She nodded impatiently wishing he would just come out and say who he was and what he wanted.

"So we have established that someone on a battlefield somewhere wishes my aid and that we have met at some time" her tone was waspish.

"This meeting is not going how I planned at all" he shoved a thick brown fringe of hair off his brow impatiently.

She remained silent looking him over trying to place where she had met him. He was younger than her, brown hair that was matted with filth and haunted wide brown eyes. His robes were torn and spattered with blood and dirt hanging from his skeletal frame. Whoever he was he had seen his share fair of death and tragedy she guessed feeling a surge of pity for him. She turned her attention to Anders, his appearance was similar to the other mans and he was not the same man she had met during the darkspawn incursion. His once easy going nature and open happy face now obliterated by hard anger.

Jowan had spent the better part of the day in the city helping to rebuild, tired from his exertions he was intent on getting a hot meal but wanted to see Marina first. He headed towards her office ambling in unaware of the meeting she was having.

His eyes widened in shock as he recognised the young mage right away "Connor?"

Connor stood and did his still bow again "Greetings Arl Jowan" he said politely.

Jowan stepped back disconcertedly having never been addressed as such before. "I am no Arl" he denied the title instantly.

"You are married to the Arlessa are you not?" Connor asked obviously confused by his reaction.

"Well, yes, but…" Jowan was at a loss for words.

"We are not legally married in Ferelden" she stated "and even if we were the Arling is tied to me being the Warden Commander of the wardens, whoever becomes the Commander after me will inherit the title."

"I was obviously misinformed and for that I apologise" Connor took his seat.

"That was a round a bout way of finding out who you are" Marina chuckled trying to ease some of the tension in the room.

"Indeed" Connor flashed a rare smile.

Marina saw Jowan hovering in the doorway uncertainly "you must be tired love, why don't you go and get something to eat" she gently let him off the hook.

He smiled gratefully "I will let Varel know where I am should you need me."

"Well now that we are all acquainted allow me to offer you some respite before we turn our minds to your business" she stood indicating that they should do the same.

"Arlessa we are pressed for time and need to return with an answer from you post haste" Connor protested.

"I don't even know the question as of yet, and I will not listen to it unless you accept my offer" she said firmly.

Connor stood bowing his head in defeat "as you wish Arlessa."

She left them in the hands of Varel, choosing to stay in her office and was wondering what they wanted. She sensed that soon she would have no choice in becoming involved in the conflict and wanted to get to the crux of the matter quickly, but having seen the condition they were in concerned her. Anders was also concerning her as she had never seen him look so angry and was debating going to find him before speaking to Connor again. She had genuinely liked him during the time she spent with him and although there had been some mild flirtations her grief at Alistair's death and his own emotional reservation had ensured that nothing had come of it. Making her decision she stood and went looking for him, asking Varel if he knew where he was, he directed her to the library saying that that was the direction he had headed in.

He was sitting poring over a book with such intense concentration that he didn't hear her come in.

"Anders?" she stepped back when he turned to her a blue glow seeming to shine through every pore in his body.

"What is it?" his voice was strangled as if trying to swallow water and breathe at the same time.

"I was concerned and rightly so it would seem. What has happened to you?" Marina asked with a forced calmness.

"You do not want to know."

"I beg to differ" she retorted.

He rubbed his hands erratically through his hair, the force of his fingers wrapping golden strands tightly around them.

"Remember Justice?"

"I could hardly forget" she replied.

"We came to an… arrangement" he said cryptically.

"Maker, Anders just come and say what you have to say" sick of him beating around the bush she was nearly yelling.

"We merged, alright? We became one and then things got out of control" he was yelling too.

"You merged? You mean he is in you?" she felt like all the wind had been punched out of her lungs.

"Yes… yes" he was almost moaning now his distress becoming more palpable. "We decided that together we could save the mages from the injustice forced upon them" his tone indicated that he had explained this many times already.

"And?" she could tell there was far more to the story.

"We blew up the Chantry in Kirkwall" he was breathing heavily trying to maintain control.

Marina sat there unable to take it all in, she could hardly believe what he was saying. Getting to her feet she started pacing rapidly her mind going into overdrive. He was responsible for his actions, but was he? Yes she decided, he willingly took a spirit into his body. Then her mind switched tracks, he wasn't really responsible, he had no idea what would happen. The inner debate continued a while longer as she tried to come to grips with what he had told her. In the end she couldn't decide whether she should punch him or hug him so she sat back down feeling and looking like she had run a marathon.

Anders had watched this silently, his once handsome face now nothing more than a quagmire of cracks and creases as premature age rapidly caught him in its grip.

"You hate me now?" his voice was so quiet she had to strain to hear him.

"I do not know what I feel" she was brutally honest. "I want to hate you but I can see what you were trying to do. I do not agree with it though, I always thought you were smarter than this."

"I thought I was being smart. I thought that by doing this I could free mages everywhere, now and in the future" he was hunched over as if trying not to vomit.

"You blew up the Chantry? You started this war?" she already knew the answers but needed some time to collect herself.

He gripped his face in his hands nodding unable to speak. Marina watched him trying to regain some semblance of control.

"I came here with Connor not to just try and secure aid for our cause but because I remembered the library here and the many books on rituals. I was hoping to be able to separate us" he looked at her sadly. "I am losing myself to him. Once it was only when I saw an injustice that he came out but now he just comes out at will. There is more him than me and I am afraid of what else I will do" he confessed feeling relieved having held his fears inside for so long.

"Somehow I don't think it could get any worse than starting a war" she remarked drily.

Anders stood the foreign glow radiating again but the voice that came from him was strangely deep yet familiar "you dare to jest? There has been much loss of life, much misery, all from injustice and you allow yourself to be glib?"

"You enter my friend turning him into a husk of a man, you cause the deaths of many and then dare to judge me?" she was on her feet shouting into his face. "Where is his justice, where is the justice for the dead that you created?"

Silver blue flames rose from his hands licking the air while dust motes swirled crazily caught in the light in a surreal display. He roared in fury and she became aware that books were whirling over her head and bookcases were crashing down around her. She froze momentarily in awe of the massive display of power, footsteps were pounding down the stone hallways as the confrontation reached the ears of wardens and guards. Connor and Jowan came running in and seeing Marina in danger Jowan threw an arcane shield over her, protecting her from the heavy tomes crashing to the floor. Anders' body was contorted as Justice took total control and the blue flames took form threatening to consume him. A bright pink light sprayed past her and hit Anders with such force that he collapsed to the floor weeping pitifully.

Marina waved the guards away while Connor and Jowan ran towards them. Jowan stood next to her an arm around her shoulders, his eyes open wide at the bizarre scene he had witnessed.

"What was that?" he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

Marina told him what had happened all the while watching Connor kneel down beside the wretched man trying to calm him. He settled Anders on a chair and came over to speak with them.

"He is nearly lost" he sighed tiredly. "This is one of the reasons that I wished to leave so soon."

"He needs help, he is a danger to himself and those around him" Jowan stated flatly.

"He wishes for death" Connor told them "but I cannot give it to him yet."

"Yet?" Marina was aghast at how coldly he said it.

"We need him still as his power turned the tide and ensured many victories. The Seekers are requesting peace talks but we still do not trust them" he admitted.

"How did he get this badly out of control?" Marina wasn't sure that this was a natural progression.

"We… we urged him. The stronger his anger the stronger his powers were. We fed his anger and he became what you see" Connor's tone was defensive.

Marina could feel a white hot fury sweeping through her "you made him this way on purpose?"

Connor remained silent trying to think of a way to justify it to her. He and his counterparts had guessed correctly what would happen but still carried on with the plan anyway. He was not proud of it but if given the chance would do it again.

"He started this war, he killed many people in an act of rebellion and now he is paying the price" he said sanctimoniously.

"You took advantage of him, of his guilt, of his anger and now you say that you are going to kill him for what you created?" Jowan's disgust was apparent.

"He created himself by taking the spirit in the first place, this would have happened eventually anyway" Connor shrugged unconcerned.

"You don't know that nor do you know how long it would take if left to progress naturally. He is a warden and could have taken to the Deep Roads long before this happened" Jowan was becoming enraged.

"Do not lecture me, if not for you I would still be at home. Mother would have found a mage that would have done the job she hired you for. You poisoned my father and out of desperation I read one of your filthy books to help him. I would not be here and my mother would still love me" he was screaming, years of pent up rage flowing freely.

Jowan looked at the man whose sense of morality he had warped with his actions and hung his head in despair as shame washed over him.

"The fact remains, Connor, regardless of what Jowan has done you have done far worse to Anders" Marina said coldly.

Connor glared at her his brown eyes nothing more than narrow slits. He paced agitatedly wanting to lash out and hurt them. He had blamed both of them for so long, Jowan for starting the terrible chain of events and her for allowing Jowan to flee and live as a free man while he had been imprisoned in that hateful circle. Jowan should have been executed and elaborate revenge fantasies had kept him going during that terrible time. Hatred had solidified within when his mother had stopped seeing him declaring him dangerous so when the war started he had joined the resistance with cold fury. He showed no mercy to anyone, not to his enemies and not to any ally he perceived as being weak or more useful dead than alive. Being forced to come here and be nice to these people filled what was left of his heart with a blackness that only would be lifted with their deaths. Once they had served their purpose he meant to see them into their graves and only then would he know peace.

If Marina knew what was going through his mind at that very moment she would have thrown him out on the spot, she was considering it anyway but knew that he would not relinquish Anders. The thought of leaving Anders in his care was abhorrent to her and she was thinking of how to make a deal. He wanted something from her and she would give it if it meant getting Anders the help he needs.

"You said that you were sent her to procure my aid for something, what exactly do you need of me?" she finally broke the silence that had fallen over them.

"You wish to help him?" Jowan regarded her closely, baffled by her offer.

She ignored him intent on getting what she wanted. She didn't know if she could help Anders but she would damn well try.

"We have been in negotiations as we declared a truce, but they broke down due to neither side being willing to compromise their beliefs or wants so it was decided that we come to you and ask you to mediate between us" Connor explained.

"Why me?" Marina was baffled.

"The seekers were agreeable to you due to your status and we were due to you being a mage" Connor said.

"I see" Marina said doubtfully, she didn't entirely believe him but couldn't see another reason he would have bothered to travel so far.

She wanted to discuss this with her men and get their perspective before making a decision as momentous as this. Looking over at Anders she called out to Wills who she knew would be hovering nearby. He materialised in the doorway his face a stony mask.

"Please see Anders to his room, lock it and keep a guard at his door" she requested.

"Yes Commander" he walked to Anders and helped him to his feet.

"If you would give me some time to consider this I would be most grateful" she inclined her head to him and stalked out.

"Varel, Jameson my office now" she commanded.

"I don't understand why you are considering aiding him" Jowan muttered.

"I am only going to help him in return for Anders."

Jowan remained silent, he didn't like it but he knew that Marina would not leave someone she cared about to suffer.

"So what do you think?" Marina had just given them a rundown of the situation and was now facing them expectantly.

"I don't like it, this Connor seems insane and there is nothing worse than an insane mage" Jameson declared vehemently.

"I must agree" Varel said. "How do we even know if he is telling the truth. Perhaps we could send Jenna on ahead to scout the situation."

"We don't have enough time for that, Connor will be leaving tomorrow and taking Anders with him, it is a risk but one I feel I must take" Marina shook her head fiercely.

"How would you even be able to help Anders?" Jowan had been wondering, if the spirit was in the fade controlling him that was one thing but for it to be living inside as part of him was another.

She shrugged her shoulders determinedly "I have been thinking, Justice was able to leave Kristoff's body to join with Anders, so there must be a way to get him out. I think what makes it difficult is that they feel as one, well that was what I gathered from Anders anyway. But if they were really one then they would be a mixture of the two, not one minute you are speaking with Anders and then Justice comes out. There has to be a way but I do not know of one yet, what I do know though is that if he stays with Connor then he is being doubly manipulated and I think we will have more success if we remove one of the controlling factors and removing Connor will be easier."

"Well we don't have to like it but whatever you decide we are behind you" Varel stated looking at the others for support.

They all nodded their heads in agreement, they didn't like it but knew they wouldn't be able to stop her so the best they could do was be there for her.

She spread her arms wide encompassing them all "thank you I could not ask for better people to stand behind me."

"Who will you be taking with you?" Varel asked.

"Jowan, of course, Jameson, if you are willing and Jenna" she had thought about this carefully.

"That few?" Varel's face was a picture of worry.

"We cannot take a large group, if we go in there with guards or wardens then it would look like an act of war" she explained.

"Are you sure you wish to take Jenna?" Jameson didn't think that she would cope.

"She is an accomplished fighter and her shifting skills will be invaluable for scouting ahead" Marina defended her decision.

"Well I am with you, we will be leaving tomorrow?" Jameson inquired.

"I am not sure, Connor wants to leave quickly but if he does not hand Anders over then we won't be going anywhere."

"Has anyone actually asked Anders what he wants?" Jowan wasn't so sure that Anders wanted to be released.

Marina laced her hands behind her head "I am not sure that he is even able to decide for himself."

"That may be true but my understanding is that he is unaware that he is being controlled by anyone other than Justice, so he might see you as taking control of his life from him rather than Connor" Jowan suggested.

Leaning against her desk Marina thought about what he said. In her haste to help him she hadn't even considered that he may not want to be helped.

"I will go and speak to him" she said.

"Is that wise?" Jowan's brow furrowed with concern.

"I am now aware of who or what I am speaking with. I'll be careful" she reassured him.

She went to speak with Anders leaving them there anxiously discussing the risks of her plan.

Knocking gently on his door before entering she saw him lying on the bed, she sat next to him garnering his attention. He smiled forlornly, his eyes red rimmed from his crying jag.

"Maker you must think me a complete fool" he mumbled.

"No I feel for you" she replied honestly "when did you start losing total control?"

"Not long after I joined the resistance, I saw and heard of so much abuse towards our people that soon Justice took a life of his own" he was staring fixedly at the ceiling.

"I see" she said. "I want to help you Anders."

"You can't help me" he moaned "I am beyond help."

"I refuse to believe that and the first way I am going to help you is to get you away from Connor."

He sat up "no they still need me and I must finish what I started."

"It is finished more or less, once the talks are over it will be done. I doubt that you would be able to participate in the talks" she pointed out.

"That is true" he admitted "but Connor said that I am still vital."

"Connor has been using you Anders. He has encouraged your anger and helped you to become what you have" she was speaking very calmly, knowing that what she was saying could very easily bring Justice out.

He thought about what she was saying "I don't think so, he has been my friend and he learned a spell to send Justice to the back of my mind so that I do not hurt people unnecessarily" he was frowning as he said it though.

"I don't think you truly believe that Anders. He learned a spell to have complete control over you. He knows how to bring Justice out and he knows how to put him back. You are at his mercy."

"No" his tone fierce "it's not true. He has been loyal to me if not for him I would have done much more damage."

"No if not for him you would not be in the state you are in. Look we can argue about this all night but Connor has admitted to me that he encouraged your anger once he knew that that was brought Justice out" she knew she was playing a dangerous game but hoped that Connor's mysterious spell was still holding Justice.

He was standing now his legs trembling violently trying to take in what she was saying. With Justice pushed back he could think clearly and he started piecing it all together. What she was saying made sense.

"Just ask yourself this Anders, have I ever lied to you?" she requested.

No she had never lied, one thing he had always admired her for was her forthright honesty and she had nothing to gain by misleading him.

"Andraste's flaming knickers you are right" he whispered.

She smiled relief flooding her "I will help Connor on the proviso that you remain here if you so wish."

"It is too dangerous what if I lose control and harm the people here?" he was shaking his head.

"I need to convince Connor to teach me the spell which I will then pass onto one of the mages here" she told him.

"How would you convince him?" he wondered hopefully.

"Leave that to me" she grinned, an idea forming.

He sat back doubt creeping back to his face "alright but I hope you know what you are doing. You will only get one chance before he realises that you are up to something."

She rose from the bed "get some rest and as soon as I know anything I will come and see you."

He stretched back out on the bed closing his eyes allowing himself to drift. She walked out of the room meaning to find Connor and put her plan into action.

Connor was in the room that had been readied for him when Marina arrived smiling her best flirtatious smile.

"Hello Connor I came to apologise for what happened before."

He looked at her suspiciously wondering what brought this change of attitude on.

"Oh don't look at me like that" she batted her eyelashes "I just thought that if we are going to be undertaking a long journey together we should make… peace" she drew the last word out on a breathy sigh.

He relaxed somewhat "so you will be giving us aid? I thought that with what had happened with Anders would have made you expel me."

"Oh no, you don't know me well enough yet to know that when I am angry I just say the most awful things. Maker you should hear some of the things I say to Jowan when he leaves his socks on the floor" she giggled girlishly.

He smiled "ah well all is forgiven."

"Oh good I was so worried that you would hate me and I would hate to have such a handsome man angry at me" she ran her finger slowly down her neck stopping at the top of her breasts.

His eyes followed it hungrily, he still hated her but it had been a long time and she was a beautiful woman.

"If only I was a few years younger and single" mock regret coloured her tone.

He stood moving closer to her "age is irrelevant and what he doesn't know won't hurt him."

She smiled at him hoping that her eyes conveyed a message of lust rather than the repulsion she felt, he was staring back an expression of pure arrogance on his face. Stroking his arm she gently pushed herself away to avoid being caught in his embrace.

"Oooh, first we should have a drink to cement our new relationship" she produced a bottle of whiskey and two glasses from seemingly nowhere.

He watched her move around busily admiring her form. Perhaps he had been wrong about her, he had always heard that she was hard headed and strong but he was seeing a flighty woman who allowed her emotions to rule her. She would be very useful once he got rid of that fool she was sharing her life with.

Marina pressed a glass into his hand and raised hers to make a toast "to new friends and… absent lovers."

He laughed and after tapping his glass against hers downed it in one swallow. He reached his arm out to grab her but she had moved back a flinty expression in her eyes. His head was swimming and he couldn't co-ordinate his movements or speech. Just as he fell to the floor he realised that he had been horribly wrong.

She ran to the door waving Jameson and Jowan in "quickly we may not have much time before he wakes."

Jowan grabbed his arms while Jameson grabbed his legs, while swinging him around to get him out of the door they cracked his head against the desk.

"Careful we need his head for a while longer" Marina cautioned.

"That was the funniest thing I have ever heard" Jameson was chortling so hard he nearly dropped Connor.

"Funny for you maybe" Jowan grumbled.

"Sweet Andraste you should have seen this one's face when you made that toast. I thought I was going to have to jump on him to restrain him" Jameson nodded towards Jowan still laughing.

"Shut up the thought of what you were suggesting made me want to rip his throat out" Jowan shook his head violently trying to rid himself of the images.

"I am sorry love, but it was necessary. Trust me I wasn't enjoying myself… alright I was a little bit" she admitted snickering.

They threw him in a cell and Marina cast a warding spell on the door as an added precaution. They left him there with instructions to the guard to alert one of them when he awakened.

An hour later they were back there, this time with Anders and Varel in attendance. Connor was sitting on the cot shooting daggers from his eyes.

"This is what is going to happen Connor" Marina said icily "you are going to teach me the spell you use to subdue Justice."

"Why should I?" he growled enraged.

"If you don't then you are never coming out of there, and I will not be going to Orlais" she stated firmly.

He stood facing them his face twisted with rage "you bitch" he shouted.

"Now, now, there is no need for such language Connor. Surely you know better" Marina mocked him.

"I will kill you, if it takes me to my dying die I will see you finished" he slammed his hand against the stone wall.

"Yes well good luck with that" Jowan said caustically.

"What do you say Connor? Do you allow your rage to ruin everything you have worked for or do you be pragmatic?" Marina was tiring of the conversation.

"I… I will do as you ask" he knew he was beaten.

"Let us start then" Marina commanded.

She removed the warding spell so he could cast magic but left him locked in the cell refusing to leave anything to chance. They worked together and finally she was confident she could perform the spell, but she needed to test it.

"I am sorry Anders but I need to bring Justice out so I can make sure that I have it right and that I have not been misled" she explained regretfully.

Anders nodded "go ahead." He stood in front of her making the men promise to strike him down if it didn't work.

Marina stood thinking of what to say, she took a deep breath and hating herself for what she was about to do, started speaking.

"Anders did you hear about the Templars that were near here?" she asked.

"No" he replied the mention of Templars making his heart pound.

"They were taking mages and torturing them in an abandoned farm house" she was injecting anger into her tone.

"They decorated the house with their remains Anders, pieces of them everywhere, displaying them."

The eerie blue glow was beginning to emerge and she sighed anxiously hoping that Connor had not been devious.

"They carried their fingers as good luck charms and…" she was thrust back as Justice broke out.

"They will pay" he boomed "they will all pay for…" she cast the spell and was gratified when Anders stumbled back and Justice was banished for a time.

"Maker" Anders exclaimed "is that true?"

"Not all of it, they had decorated the house as I said but I don't know if all of their victims were mages and I sincerely hope that they did not carry fingers as good luck charms" she wiped sweat from her forehead.

"What do we do with him?" Varel asked motioning towards Connor.

"I am not sure, he is Arl Eamon's son after all" Marina mused.

"You said that if I taught you the spell that you would release me" Connor protested angrily.

"No I said that if you didn't teach me the spell then you would stay there" Marina reminded him.

"Bah, semantics" Connor spat at her.

"Perhaps, but you must admit that our relationship hasn't been conducive to trust as of yet" Marina pointed out.

Connor sat on his cot sullenly, glaring at them all so furiously they were glad he was safely locked away.

"What do you think Varel?" Marina asked feeling that he would be the most objective at this point.

He rubbed his hands over his mouth thinking "do you not need him to attend the meeting?"

"I know where they are being held, I was going to stay here but this far more important" Anders remarked.

"Are you sure that this is what you want?" Marina frowned not wanting to stress him any further.

"Yes, but I would like to be able to return here with you when we are done" he said quietly.

"Of course" Marina assured him.

"But they will be expecting Connor to return with us" Jowan interjected.

"They will not really care, he is expendable as we all are. At this point all we need is someone with a clear head" Anders stated.

Marina nodded slowly, what they were saying made perfect sense, turning to face Connor she looked at him and found herself feeling pity for him.

"You know what Eamon said when we were at Redcliffe was right, if it weren't for these stupid laws then Isolde would never have hired Jowan, Connor never would have been sent away and they would have lived as a normal family" Marina exhorted.

"I wouldn't have blown up the Chantry" Anders put in.

"My parents would not have feared me" Jowan added.

"And I too would have been able to stay with my family, we have the opportunity to try and put right centuries of oppression" Marina finished.

"You don't sound very unbiased" Varel laughed.

"I will be though, we don't need to create another Tevinter Imperium" Marina said gravely.

"And if we let mages like him take control that is exactly what we will get" Jowan stated.

"It still does not address the problem of what to do with Connor though" Marina rubbed her head tiredly.

"Leave him for Arl Eamon to deal with" Jameson spoke up.

"It is settled then, Anders will take us to the talks and we will let Eamon deal with Connor. Perhaps he can set right with him what the Chantry destroyed" Marina decided.

"When shall we leave?" Jowan requested.

"How soon can we be ready?" Marina turned to Varel.

"Tomorrow if need be" Varel replied thoughtfully.

Marina nodded "go and prepare what you need to while I see if Jenna will be agreeable to accompanying us."


	6. Chapter 6

They set off the following day, the wind whipped around them and the skies loomed grey and dark threatening to soak them with a deluge. Marina sighed this didn't bode well she thought, shaking her head she pushed the suspicious thoughts from her mind and started trudging with the others. No-one spoke for quite some time, all of them lost in their thoughts of what lay in store. The days went by uneventfully and they thought it strange that no opportunists had stumbled upon them and tried to rob them but were grateful for it.

Making camp for what was hopefully the last time before they arrived in Orlais Marina tried to busy herself feeling whispers of anxiety starting to form in her stomach. Anders approached her as she was preparing the wood for a fire, he had relaxed a little since leaving Connor behind but was still moody and reticent. Luckily there had been no reason for Justice to make an appearance and Marina strengthened her resolve to find a way to separate them.

"Are you ready for what is to come?"

Marina looked at him wondering how to tell him she was nowhere near ready.

He smiled, a rare event "I am only asking because I am wondering if there is any way I can help? I don't know how I could, but if you need to bounce some ideas off someone I am willing to listen."

"Thank you Anders, honestly I don't have any idea what to say as I am not sure what to expect. I was just going to play it by ear" she laughed nervously hoping that she hadn't annoyed Justice.

Anders seemed to have read her mind "I haven't felt Justice as much lately."

"Do you mind if I ask you something Anders?"

"Go ahead" he waited expectantly.

"If you are one, as you say, would you not feel him within you? What I mean is, how is it one minute you are you then you are him? It seems to me that if you are one then you would be a… blend of both rather than two separate beings occupying one body."

He thought for a moment "you know I haven't really thought about it, as soon as he entered me I just accepted him to be a part of me."

"Well, perhaps he isn't just a part of you, more like a… lodger?" Marina peered at him half expecting Justice to come out and smite her.

"Hmmm perhaps" Anders murmured doubtfully.

"Well, something to think on anyway" she said nonchalantly trying to give the impression of someone who wasn't all that concerned.

Anders wandered away slowly and took up his usual position near the edge of the camp staring out as if expecting someone to attack him at any moment.

Jowan had been watching the exchange, unable to hear, but still alert just in case Justice made an appearance. He would be happy once this was done and he could get Marina as far away from Anders as possible. His shoulders slumped as his thoughts continued, he knew that she would not leave it alone until she had completed what she set out to do. And no-one, including her, knew if what she wanted was even possible. It didn't matter he would stay by her side no matter what she did, that much was certain.

Jameson and Jenna had been watching too, Jameson for much the same reasons but when he looked over at the young woman he saw that the expression on her face was much the same as the one she had reserved for Jowan before her crush had been crushed.

"You have a thing for disturbed mages huh?" he asked drily.

"What" she looked over startled to find him watching her.

"Jowan, now him" he nodded his head towards Anders "you seem to have a very self-destructive streak."

"Well, at least my 'thing' is more eligible than yours" she retorted defensively.

"What?" now it was his turn to be startled, was he that transparent.

"Oh don't act all innocent, it's sooo obvious, you would die for her."

"She is my Commander that is what I am meant to do" his tone was sharp.

"Uh huh sure, keep telling yourself that, one day you may believe it" she got up and stalked away.

He shook his head pushing his blade against the whetstone aggressively flinching as sparks flew at his eyes.

The next day dawned bright and clear and their steps were quick, happy but apprehensive to be only a few hours walk from their destination. Jenna became a bird at Marina's request and flew ahead to try and see what was in store for them.

"I hope some hungry archer doesn't spot her" Anders frowned.

"Imagine his surprise to find a woman fall at his feet" Jameson laughed at the thought.

"Funny, unless it happens and I am guessing that food may not be the only thing they are starved for" Anders snapped.

Jameson held his hands up in a gesture of peace "whoa there I sincerely hope that it doesn't happen, but still, imagine his shock" he couldn't stifle the chuckle that rose again.

Anders threw a side long glance at his fellow warden trying to maintain control. Justice hadn't surged up yet, but he could feel the rumblings of him stirring, outraged that someone would be so cavalier about the safety of another. He tensed forcing him back down, appeasing him with assurances that he was simply joking and that if such a thing did happen that Jameson would be vengeful. Justice muttered angrily but went back to resting at the back of his mind.

As they got closer to Orlais the stench of the pyres burning the dead made them retch, the smoke was heavy above and around them obliterating the blue sky. It was unnaturally quiet, there was no sign of life and Marina began to wonder if they had come on a wild goose chase.

Anders stopped and touched her arm "I must leave you here, if they see me then they will want to arrest me. No matter how much they desire peace they desire my death more."

Marina puckered her brow "where will you go? Will you be safe?"

He nodded "yes I will be fine. I cannot return to the resistance without Connor but I know of somewhere that I can hide."

"Take someone with you" Marina urged "just in case."

He shook his head violently "no, being with me at any time is dangerous, but here more so."

"I will go with him" Jenna volunteered eagerly. "I can always fly away if he loses control and I can also come along and see how the talks are going."

"I cannot allow…" Anders began.

"Pfft I will do as I please" she huffed annoyed.

Marina held her hand up "I think it's a fine idea. Jenna is right, if you know what is going on then you will be more at ease and more likely to maintain control."

Anders shrugged before agreeing reluctantly. He gave her directions to where the talks were being held before he moved away with Jenna following quickly behind.

Marina took the lead with Jowan and Jameson falling in behind her. They didn't know it but they were all thinking the same thing. There were only three of them a long way from home, if things turned nasty they would more than likely die here. Their footsteps echoed around them bouncing off the half burned and demolished buildings around them, somewhat muffled by the constant surge of smoke. Statues that had stood proudly were now cracked, some nothing more than piles of rubble and dust. Streets that had sparkled with silverite threaded through the burnt orange bricks were stained with blood and black scorch marks stretched as far as the eye could see.

None of them had been to Orlais before but they had all heard about the beauty and culture and were saddened to see it as a husk, a city of the dead. They could hear some noise ahead of them and they walked unaware that they were almost running, trying to get away from the morgue like atmosphere of the rest of the city.

The building they were going to was one of a mere handful that were still standing, it looked like perhaps it been a tower of some import and they stopped and stared in awe, it once had clearly been an imposing structure. What looked like gold filigree, now was tarnished a dull orange and was flaking in a slow but macabre dance to the ground, settling on the cobbled street before being blown away by a gush of death filled smoke. The bricks were now grey and black but if you peered closely you could see that it had once been a marbled blue with purple streaking through it in swirls.

Huddled groups of people were sitting around the streets, their faces stretched in grief and misery, some still unable to believe all that had happened to their proud home, others just had grim acceptance and seemed to be merely waiting to die. A young child wailed and his mother stirring out of her apathy tried to comfort him her arm stilling after a moment, returning to her indifference. The air was strained with their hopelessness and Marina began to wish for just the smoke to be around them. The groups of homeless didn't seem to notice the three and gratefully Marina and her group slipped past them unnoticed.

Two guards stopped them inside the door, crossing their swords in front of them.

"There is no help for you here" one muttered tiredly, obviously having said it many times before.

"I am the Commander of the Grey in Ferelden I was told that I am expected" Marina stated deferentially.

The guard looked at her suspiciously "why should I believe you?"

"Because I am telling you the truth" Marina answered patiently. She had no wish to further burden these two.

"It is her" the second lowered his sword "I recognise her."

The first one nodded "go through, up one flight of stairs, the room you are looking for is at the end of the hallway."

The both stepped aside allowing them to pass.

"They didn't seem too concerned with us" Jowan said his paranoia surging.

"They probably expect the Warden Commander to be accompanied" Jameson replied.

"What worries me is that, even though we are expected, why are they waiting in the room that the talks are being held in? It has been some time since Connor and Anders left, also why did the seekers not send their own representative why two mages? Well if they didn't know about Anders just one mage. It doesn't make sense." Marina's thoughts were racing and all the questions she should have asked but had not thought of in her eagerness to help Anders were now occurring to her.

The two men pondered her words and found it all to be strange but not wanting to increase the anxiety that Marina was obviously feeling remained silent.

The halls were pristine and if it wasn't for the lack of activity you could almost believe that they were nowhere where battles had been raging. Two heavy looking wooden doors loomed before them and they all unconsciously slowed their steps taking as long as they could to reach them. Jowan wanted to grab Marina's arm and run in the other direction as fast as he could. What would be waiting for them on the other side, none of them knew but they couldn't deny the feeling of foreboding that had settled upon them. Taking what seemed like the millionth deep breath since she got there Marina straightened her shoulders and knocked on the door with a confidence she didn't feel.

The doors slowly swung open and to their relief what looked exactly like peace talks were occurring. A massive oak table stood majestically between two groups of very tired people. The people occupying the room turned to see who was entering and looks of relief swept across their faces as they knew one way or the other their wrangling was nearly at an end.

"Good afternoon" Marina nodded her head respectfully if not a little apprehensively.

"Good afternoon Warden Commander or should I call you Arlessa?" a little man with white hair smattering his nearly bald scalp came rushing over.

"Marina is preferable" she smiled at him.

"But surely not" a tall woman with short dark hair and even darker eyes declared.

Marina politely ignored her protestations "I am at a disadvantage, I am sorry but I do not know who I am speaking with."

"Of course, of course" the little man shot a dark look at the woman. "I am First Enchanter Ormond" he paused for a minute scratching a finger between his eyes "mmm not really a First enchanter anymore, perhaps merely Enchanter, no, no, still too circlish. I don't really have a title..." he was cut off by an impatient sigh.

"He is the rebel leader, I am Cassandra Pentaghast, at your service Warden Commander. Leader of the Seeker army for the White Divine" she stated with a sweeping bow.

"I am the resistance leader" Ormond corrected her his chest puffing up with pride.

"Too much pride, you will surely fall" Cassandra sneered.

"I have not fallen and I will not" Ormond yelled.

"ENOUGH" Marina shouted her voice booming over the two of them. "We are here to come to a consensus and you two need to calm down" she commanded.

They both stopped, looking at her, not sure whether to be angry or grateful that she was able to take control of the situation. They seemed to decide on being angrily grateful and Ormond ushered her huffily to a chair.

Jowan and Jameson followed and stood behind her taking in the others in the room. They had three people with them each, all of them seeming to be guards of some sort. The six stood looking blankly, they had not even flinched with all the arguing and Jowan guessed that they had seen many such confrontations.

Marina addressed them composedly "I first would like to thank you for allowing me to be part of such a historic event. But first if I may impose, my companions and I have travelled for many days and if we could take some time to rest we would be most grateful."

"Of course, of course" Ormond jumped back to his feet, turning to one of his guards "please arrange three rooms if you would so our guests can get some rest… oh and some meals."

Marina smiled "two rooms will be sufficient and we would be thankful for a meal."

Cassandra arched an eyebrow at the mention of two rooms and wondered which one the Warden Commander would be sharing with. She had heard rumours of her becoming involved with a blood mage but had dismissed it as vicious gossip. There was indeed a mage with her but it would remain to be seen if he was a maleficar.

She nodded at one of her own guards to accompany the mage and he followed wearily, moving slowly as if weighed down by his cumbersome armour.

The guards came back and Marina excused herself and her party "we shall rest overnight and I suggest that you all do the same, please reconvene here tomorrow after breakfast."

Marina and Jowan entered their room, happy that Jameson's was right next to theirs. They didn't sense any aggression towards them but were still more comfortable being close to each other.

"Jameson" Marina said getting his attention "when you are done washing up if you could join us for your meal?"

He nodded entering his room, eyeing the soft looking bed hungrily he had a pang of guilt thinking of the poor people they had seen outside. It shouldn't worry him as he had seen this many times but at least in Amaranthine they did their best to make the refugees comfortable. Here they were just left out there to rot.

He joined them after directing the person with his food to take it to the other room, they sat eating allowing themselves to relax slightly.

"What do you think?" Marina mumbled through her mashed potato.

Jowan's fork hovered near his mouth before he sat it back on his plate "they are overwrought, but too damn proud to back down or compromise. She called the old man prideful, she is lucky she is not a mage for she would surely have fallen by now."

Jameson nodded "that is true, all of it. I don't trust her and he is not as absent minded as he seems."

"Mmm he mustn't be or he would not have led the mages this far and yes she is one to watch very carefully" Marina agreed.

"How long before one of them is here pleading their case, do you think?" Jowan asked.

"Hopefully they will give us time to finish eating" Jameson tucked back in.

"What are you planning to do tomorrow?" Jowan wondered.

"Listen mainly I suppose, see what they want and try to get them to come to some accord" Marina shrugged her shoulders, there wasn't much else she could do.

They were disturbed by the sound of ruffling feathers as a bird landed on the windowsill. It jumped down and Jenna took her form "Maker it was hard to find which room you were in" she exclaimed.

"How is… are things?" Marina enquired carefully, not really sure how alone they were.

"Fine, I just came to see that you are all safe. It is all quite fascinating you know?" Jenna said enthusiastically.

They had to laugh, it was anything but fascinating to them.

Soft footfalls could be heard and Marina shooed Jenna from the room "come back tomorrow at about the same time I may have more news then."

Jameson opened the door and was relieved to see that it was just the servant coming for their plates. He closed the door only to have to open it again, immediately, to Ormond.

"Ahh all is comfortable I hope" he smiled expansively.

"Yes it is unexpectedly lovely" Marina indicated a chair for him to sit down on.

"It is… unfortunate… the people outside I mean" he did genuinely look regretful.

None of them spoke, waiting to hear what he was there for.

"I am curious, the mage, Connor, who came to see you. He did not return with you?" Ormond cocked his head to the side.

"He is remaining as my guest at Vigil's Keep. When he arrived he had encountered some darkspawn and seemed unwell. We are keeping him under observation" Marina lied gravely.

"And what of his companion?" Ormond didn't look he entirely bought her explanation.

"He remained with him, to watch over him. I have never seen such two good friends" Marina smiled guilelessly.

"Hmmm, well hopefully he will be feeling better. I hear the corruption is a slow and painful death" he accepted the lie too quickly.

"It is not pleasant, no" Marina agreed.

"I have never heard of a pleasant death" Jowan remarked "I mean, I have never heard anyone say oh look at how he died I can't wait until that happens to me."

Jameson started laughing "I know right? That looked like a party that death, I might just go try that out."

Marina shook her head at their antics, pleased that they got along so well now, they were two of the most important men in her life and her only family.

"Ignore them" she said to the baffled mage "what do I owe to the pleasure of this visit?"

"Ah yes, well, I was wanting to know how much you knew of our… negotiations."

"Next to nothing" Marina admitted cheerfully "I thought that I would probably find out tomorrow."

He nodded excitedly pulling a piece of crumpled parchment from his robes "this is what we want. Now I know you are supposed to be neutral but you are a mage after all and I was hoping…" Marina cut him off with a wave of her hand.

"I will look at this, but be aware, mage or no, I will be fair to everyone. No-one, mage or non-mage should be treated like a second class citizen. Now if you will allow us to look this over I would be appreciative" she ushered him out of the door before he could get too settled.

Cassandra paid them a similar visit with a similar parchment and was treated in a similar way.

The three of them looked over the parchments, scribbling down what they thought was fair and what they considered to be indulgent whims on both sides and finally sat down to compare notes. Not surprisingly they were pretty much on the same wavelength and after revising their list a few times, Marina's head hit the table, falling asleep, and they decided that enough was enough and went to bed.

The negotiations went on for several days, many nobles, including Queen Anora, came wanting to be a part of it but were sent on their way much to their annoyance. Cassandra and Ormond were both put out by how much Marina seemed to defer to her guards, but once Marina explained to them that they were her advisors as well they accepted it. Marina's head felt like it was about to explode and was starting to fear that it would never end until they finally had a break through. Both sides agreed and the three of them wanted to dance with joy.

The terms of the treaty were simple really, mages would not be taken from their families and would be free to live and work amongst their fellow citizens. There would be laws governing the uses of magic and schools set up where they could learn to control their powers and how to resist temptations. The rite of tranquillity or execution would only be performed once a mage had been tried and convicted by a jury of his peers. Blood magic remained a capital offence and the rite of annulment was now entirely ruled out with anyone trying to invoke it risking execution. Templars would now be stationed at every town, separate from the Chantry and would only be able to attack a mage in self-defence. They would be trained to apprehend rather than kill. It wasn't perfect and it would take a lot of time for everyone to adjust but if everyone stuck to it then it would work. Marina was sure that the other kingdoms would agree as they were tired of this war and more than a few were sympathetic to the mages.

"How do we know that you will adhere to this agreement?" Ormond asked eyeing Cassandra suspiciously.

"How do we know you will?" she returned acidly.

"Do not start bickering, if there is any chance that this will be adhered to there needs to be a modicum of trust on both sides" Marina declared firmly.

They both nodded reluctantly.

"Now we need to have this transcribed and sent to all the nobility of Thedas. There will probably be some resistance but you have to stand firm and remain a united front" Marina advised them.

They again nodded reluctantly.

"I would like a copy also, and all copies must be signed to ensure that they are believed to be authentic" Marina stated firmly.

It took several more days for the transcriptions to be completed, Marian looked over all of them to make sure they were correct and then arranged for them to be sent out.

They all thanked her fervently for her help. Marina didn't know how things would work out in the long run, but she felt she had done all she could and would be happy to go home.

"Marina, I would like to accompany you back to Amaranthine" Ormond requested.

"No, I have much to do there to rebuild as I am sure you have much to do here to make sure that everything goes smoothly. Of course once everything is settled you will be most welcome" Marina put him off, not knowing what was happening with Connor.

They took their leave the following day after arranging with Jenna during her nightly visit where they should meet.

Marina handed her copy of the treaty to Anders and waited slightly frightened by what his or Justice's reaction may be. In a bid to make herself feel better she had the spell to push Justice away simmering. They were sitting around the campfire on their first night on the way home waiting to see what he had to say. Both Jameson and Jowan were ready to take him out at the first sign of aggression but fortunately it was not necessary.

"This is acceptable, in fact it's more than acceptable" they all breathed a sigh of relief at Anders' words.

"I am so glad that you approve" Marina breathed a sigh of relief "this way everyone is equal and hopefully everyone will be satisfied with the agreement."

Anders nodded "yes, some will not be happy but I think they will fear another war. Thank you… for everything."

She patted his shoulder "we will find a way Anders."

A frown passed over his face and a silvery blue started to come to his eyes, but it was gone as soon as it appeared. Smiling he ruffled her hair affectionately.


	7. Chapter 7

After many weeks of solid travelling the five were exceedingly glad to see the gates of Vigil's Keep looming. For once, Marina noted gratefully, they weren't greeted by the sight and smell of smoke and death. The city of Amaranthine was nearly fully rebuilt and the citizens were slowly returning and reclaiming their homes.

Varel and Teagan were waiting for them in the main hall, grave looks on their faces. Marina had been hoping that the Connor situation would have been dealt with by the time she returned. Smiling hesitantly she moved forward grasping each of them in a warm hug.

"It is good to see you back home" Varel beamed, glad that some of the responsibility of the keep would be off his shoulders. "All went well I hope?"

Marina nodded "yes, an accord was struck but it still remains to be seen how well the reform will work. Time will tell I suppose."

She turned her attention to Teagan "I am guessing that you are here with regards to Connor?"

"Yes, I was to bring him home to Redcliffe but he refuses, saying he would rather rot than spend any time with his mother" Teagan sighed heavily.

"That is not surprising, seeing how she ended up treating him" Marina observed.

Teagan nodded miserably, he had no idea how to shift Connor from his stubborn stance, and had no desire to return home without him. Eamon had been ecstatic when he knew that Connor had been found, Isolde incredibly less so. Wincing he remembered her high-pitched wailing, bemoaning the fact that the child she had once cherished and was willing to die for was now back in their life. Eamon had gotten his way in the end though and Isolde had grudgingly agreed to have him back. It was a shame really, they had been so much in love and now they either spent their time together in frosty silence or heated argument Teagan reflected. Shaking his head sharply to clear his mind of the depressing thoughts, he returned his attention back to Marina.

"That is very true unfortunately" he replied grimly. "Alas, there is nothing we can do to change what has happened. Eamon was adamant that I bring him back but I do not relish the idea of dragging him back unwillingly."

Marina nodded understandingly, she felt sorry for the forlorn looking man in front of her and wished she knew how to fix this problem. But after the draining travelling and negotiating she was having a hard time thinking about anything clearly.

"Perhaps the Commander would be more able to help once she has shaken some of the dust of the road from her boots" Varel suggested gently.

"Of course, my apologies Marina" Teagan's placed his hand gently on Marina's arm.

"No need to apologise" Marina said airily, secretly grateful to Varel for his intervention.

Marina slept fitfully that night, dreams of darkspawn with Connor's face causing her to waken frequently with rivulets of sweat coursing down her face and chest. Jowan patiently wiped her face with a cold cloth before she finally found some rest in his arms, the beating of his heart keeping her fears at bay.

Jowan was worried about her as he knew that her days were becoming increasingly numbered. All he wanted to do was take her to somewhere peaceful before her calling, shuddering he remembered her telling him that she had only about ten years left. Once, ten years had seemed like such a long time, but lately it felt far too short. He stroked her hair and was happy when she calmed down and fell into a deep sleep, but still the worry gnawed at him keeping him awake for the rest of the night.

Marina awoke feeling sluggish, she placed her hand against her head and cast a rejuvenation spell grunting with frustration when it only provided minimal relief. She was still at a loss of what to do about Connor, the guilt that she felt for his predicament was bearing down on her and from the look on Jowan's face he was feeling somewhat the same. Hopefully an idea would present itself to her because her overworked brain was refusing to function past get out of bed, get dressed and find something to eat.

Jowan left Marina in the dining room telling her he would be back in a moment. She smiled through a mouth full of food, happy that her brain seemed to be more co-operative now that her hunger was being banished. She was glad to have a moment alone and smiled ruefully to herself. She always seemed to have either too much time on her hands or not enough, one day she would find a balance she mused. Her solitude was short lived however as Teagan sat with her, the same defeated look on his face.

"I have just come from speaking with Connor again" he remarked.

"No luck in getting him to change his mind I take it?"

"No" he leaned on the table cupping his chin in his hands.

Marina stretched feeling much more herself "I wish I had some brilliant strategy, but honestly I am at a loss as to what could change his mind. Would it even be advisable to take him home?"

"I don't think so, but Eamon is sure that he will be able to help him and Isolde mend their differences" his tone was doubtful.

"You don't think so though do you?" Marina enquired quietly.

"No, in fact I think it will just make things worse. But even if I could get Eamon to agree where would he go?"

"That is a good question, and one I don't have an answer to" Marina was apologetic.

Teagan waved his hand at her "this is not your doing. This problem stems from so many sources that it is hard to unravel it, and that in itself makes it nigh on impossible to solve."

"There will be a solution, it just hasn't occurred to us yet" Marina was optimistic. "You know, that's how I've always solved all my problems. I just wait and an answer invariably presents itself."

Teagan laughed "somehow I don't think that is strictly true."

"No it is, during the blight and when there was trouble here I walked around racking my brain for answers only to have them given to me by circumstance" she whispered in a conspiratorial tone.

Teagan boomed with laughter and she felt better to see the worry lines disappear from his eyes for a time.

"Well, hopefully the answer to this one throws itself at our feet" he patted her arm.

"Why do people keep patting me?" she wondered "have I turned into a cat and no-one has bothered to tell me?"

This ridiculous comment brought about more hysterical guffaws from both of them causing the others in the room to look at them in alarm, worried that they were losing their minds.

Jameson entered the room, stopping for a minute at the sight of them swaying in their chairs from laughter.

"Anders and Jenna have gone" he told them quietly.

"Gone? What do you mean gone?" Marina demanded.

"Just what I said, they are gone."

"Where?"

"I don't know, they left this" he handed her a note "perhaps it will have some sort of explanation."

_Dear Marina,_

_Please don't be angry with us, but Jenna had some ideas as to finding some sort of solution to my problem. We know you have other things on your mind and as such decided to investigate the possibilities ourselves. I hope I don't appear to be ungrateful, as I appreciate everything you have done for me over the years. I will not return until I have rid myself of Justice and can return to having a normal life. Jenna told me to write that you shouldn't be worried for her as she is quite capable of looking after herself. I told her that that sounded quite defensive but then she hit me so I wrote it anyway._

_Forever in your debt_

_Anders_

Marina chuckled at the last part of the letter and admitted to herself that she was quite relieved to have that problem removed from her to do list. She mentally wished them luck and went back to thinking about Connor.

Jowan had decided to visit Connor and was allowing him to vent his pent up anger at him. By his estimation he deserved a lot of it and was leaning against the wall opposite his cell nodding and agreeing with much of what the young man was saying. Connor stopped yelling after a time and stared at him in consternation.

"Why are you just standing there? Why don't you defend yourself?" he demanded angrily.

"Because you can't defend the indefensible" Jowan was patient in his reply.

This served to only make Connor more furious. "Maker you're annoying" he finally breathed.

"I have heard this before" Jowan smiled. "Look I only want to help you, you may not believe it, but it is the truth."

"Why?" Connor spat.

"What I did was wrong, not only that but I had some freedom while you were locked away in that Maker forsaken tower. Helping you will give me some measure of peace."

"So you want to help me for your own selfish purposes?"

"The only reason people do anything is to benefit themselves, they may look like they are helping or being charitable but when all is said and done, they will gain some advantage for their actions" Jowan shrugged he may as well be honest.

Connor considered what he said for a few moments before speaking "so how do you propose to aid me?"

Again Jowan shrugged "I don't really know, it would help if I knew what you wanted. The war is over, the resistance are now an acknowledged political power, so what plans did you have once it was done?"

"I had no plans really, just to be free" Connor's replied near tears, the irony of his situation hitting him with full force for the first time.

Jowan pushed himself away from the wall "You really have no desire to return home, maybe mend some bridges with your parents?"

Connor tugged at his ear "perhaps father, but never that shrew he married."

Jowan nodded "I'll see what I can do for you. What you did was wrong, but I am all for second chances, perhaps we can come to some agreement."

Connor watched his retreating hopefully, his anger was just about dissipated and hopelessness was setting in. All he really wanted was to be free, to live a normal life and he began to wonder how he had travelled so far from the good intentions he had joined in the war with. Sitting on his bunk he began to cry for the first time since he had been taken to the tower. Hot tears spilled down his face and dripped unchecked to his lap as he grieved for his lost youth and innocence.

Marina and Teagan looked up in surprise to see Jowan marching toward them with a determined expression on his face. He stopped squarely in front of them with his hands planted on his hips. Marina raised an eyebrow having never seen Jowan look so intent since he had enlisted her help that fateful day many years ago.

"I want you to release Connor" he declared.

"What?" Marina crossed her arms defiantly.

"You heard me."

"Alright then why?" she clarified.

"Everyone deserves a second chance Marina, especially him."

"I am only willing to release him into Teagan's care" her tone was becoming dangerously angry.

"Why? He doesn't wish to go there and from what I understand Isolde isn't keen to have him back" he was pacing in front of them now.

"But Jowan, Eamon wants…" Teagan began but Jowan cut him off.

"To the void with what Eamon wants, the boy needs to be allowed to have a life of his own. Eamon is a good man but his intent is selfish. If he wants to have anything to do with Connor he needs to let him be, Connor stated that he would enjoy some sort of relationship with his father but if you force him back there it will only be a matter of time before he does something stupid" Jowan was shouting at the amazed pair.

"What of what he did to Anders?" Marina questioned.

"What he did was wrong, but we all make mistakes. Maker's breath love, you forgave me after I betrayed you, turned to forbidden magic and poisoned Eamon. You forgave Anders for being stupid enough to merge with a spirit in the first place. What Connor did pales in comparison to those things so why can't you forgive him?" his voice had become that earnest tone she knew so well.

"Jowan makes a good point" Teagan was still slightly miffed by Jowan's to the void remark but had to admit that what he said made sense.

Marina thought for a moment "where would he go? I mean we can't just turn him out."

"I think that is exactly what he wants" Jowan told her.

"You think?" Marina enquired.

"I asked him and he said all he wanted was to be free."

"What about the threats he levelled towards us?" Marina wasn't prepared to forgive and forget that.

"He was angry, I just spent the last hour down there with him yelling at me, honestly I think that given the chance he would leave without looking back. Please Marina he has had a hard life through no fault of his own" Jowan was outright pleading with her now.

"Ugh why can't I say no to you?" she sighed in resignation "fine he can go, just make sure he leaves."

Jowan kissed her on the cheek before bouncing away happily to give Connor the good news.

Connor peered at him suspiciously when he told the guard to open the cell door. Jowan took him to the guards bathing area and pushed some clean clothes, soap and a towel into his hands.

"Get washed up and then we will talk some more" with that he left the younger man wondering what was going on.

Connor luxuriated in the warm water, he had forgotten what it was like to feel clean. Thinking this was some ritual before execution he took his time and reflected on his past misdeeds, trying to make peace with his conscience. Pulling on the clean clothes he was astonished to find Jowan waiting for him and a small table laden with food and drink.

"Is this my last meal?" Connor mumbled feeling ice cold fear grip his stomach.

"What? No, your last meal here, but not forever I hope" Jowan rushed to put him at ease.

"Last meal here? Does this mean you are letting me go?"

"Yes, that is exactly what it means. Marina decided that you should get the chance to have a normal life and as long as you don't try to make good on your death threats we wish you happiness."

They spent the next hour eating and talking and found that under different circumstances they would probably have been close friends.

Jowan pushed a bag of coin into Connor's hand as well as some odds and ends he had collected that he thought he might need "here take this and travel safely."

Connor looked at them man he had sworn to kill and realised that the urge had gone. He was going to take his second chance and make the most of it. With a final wave he turned and trudged off towards Amaranthine city, for the first time in a long time he had no plan and he liked the idea of being aimless.

"Are you angry with me?" Jowan murmured against Marina's ear, capturing her from behind.

"No, I understand why you did what you did. I just hope it doesn't come back to bite us" she turned in his arms grateful for the distraction from filing, a job she detested more than going to the deep roads.


	8. Epilogue

Epilogue

Jowan rolled over groping his hand out for Marina to find that her side of the bed was empty. He sat up and his heart sank when he spied an ivory envelope propped up on her dresser, his name neatly scrawled on the front of it. He stared at it for a while as if expecting it to leap up and attack him, drawing in a ragged breath he crossed the room and snatched it up.

_My love,_

_I write this with a heavy heart and trembling fingers, I never wanted to leave you this way but I know you would have insisted on coming with me and I could not abide that. Know this, I love you, from the time you took my hand and wiped away my tears at the circle to when you placed my ring on my finger I have loved you. _

_Goodbye my dearest, as I walk into the deep roads you are with me, and you will give me the strength I need. Do not cry, one day we will be reunited and we will have an eternity to love each other._

_My heart is forever yours_

_Marina_

As he threw the envelope on the dresser something made a clinking sound as it fell out. Reaching over he picked it up and gasped in surprise, it was the small heart he had made her when they were children during an arts and crafts lesson. He fingered it gently, amazed that she had kept it for so long, pulling a piece of twine from a pair of his pants he strung the heart onto it and tied it around his neck.

Marina's knees buckled from exhaustion, she had battled her way through masses of darkspawn and was beginning to wonder when one would finally end her. A Hurlock leaped out of a side passage taking her by surprise, he made a noise that resembled maniacal laughter and locked his hand around her wrist. Her chest heaved in panic as she realised what he intended.

"No, you will not take me alive you foul creature" she screamed, her voice betraying her terror.

Pulling her dagger from her belt she placed it against her neck, summoning all of her courage she pushed severing her jugular, blood gushed down her shoulder and she repressed the instinctive urge to heal herself. Her eyes closed and as she embraced the darkness the image of her one true love danced into her mind, smiling she mouthed his name with her last dying breath.


End file.
